#Star Trek: -showing me two people who cannot be together- and they were Vulcans
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your stonn/t'pring fics are so good!!!! i love them a lot and thank you for writing them <333
Thank you!! The Stonn/T'Pring-Spock dynamic is literally 'I would find you in any lifetime' vs '...to get another divorce' to me and I love it. Let Stonn appear more prominently in SNW to cement this into canon!
(them in my newest fic)
#Stonn/T'Pring#T'Pring holds out her hands - marriage in one and divorce in the other#I'm glad people like those fics~!! I really enjoy writing them <3 eve n though I make them anonymous bc I get embarrassed!!!!#Q&A#kind anon#so much angst potential in T'Pring/Stonn...sorry guys the straight forbidden love got me v_v yeeeaahh they got my ass again#Star Trek: -showing me two people who cannot be together- and they were Vulcans#Me: -picking up Tuvok/T'Pel and T'Pring/Stonn- oh my god...and they were Vulcans....#I love Vulcan marriage and Vulcan love WHAT CAN I SAY#Gonna kill me?? Gonna stonn a guy to death for relishing in the description of rooms and houses???#Anyway thank you so much anon~!! Made my day <3#bee doodles#though based on how SNW writes male characters I'll bet Stonn will have to cheat on her in 2 seconds flat
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My beloved Nina, also known as the very gifted PinaNaponi, and here as @vulnerasanenturmyprince. I cannot tell you how much this lady means to me. She's on a hiatus from fandom right now, but I couldn't not dedicate some love to my sweet friend.
Nina and I met during one of the worst periods of my life. And she had no idea just how much joy she brought into my life then, because I kept so much of what I was dealing with hush hush. Our first time interacting was a literal cry for help on my end where Nina told me "if you're okay talking to a literal stranger, my DMs are open." Which just goes to show how openhearted and generous she is. She gave me so much support that day.
When I was struggling, and feeling alone, and afraid, Nina reminded me that decent people exist. She's walked through rough situations with such grace and class. All before we were properly friends. And she is, somehow, all the more wonderful when she's in your corner.
This lady is intelligent, skilled, creative, and passionate, and kind. I adore her to bits. And even when she slipped out of fandom, we've kept in touch. And I know without a doubt that whatever our distance on this earth, and in fandom, whatever life throws in our way, I've got this lady for good. And she simply must be celebrated! She writes, narrates, draws, and even binds books! Talk about a quadruple threat!
So here are some goodies of Nina's for you to admire. All below the cut because I got carried away with hers and it's longer than usual!
Art:
Rockstar AU Severus & Harry
Snarry Sanctuary Discord icon
Compulsory Figures fanart
Snape's nose art for Impeccable Logic and Belated Epiphanies
Severus' birthday (Snarry)
Star Trek Snarry
Dron Christmas (for me!)
Snarry Christmas
Birthday Fic-Bindings:
Danpuff short stories
Genuinely, I cried. (She also included yummy German snackies in the package, but that's besides the point.) Is there a better gift to give someone? To put your love into giving another's work physical shape? I have a physical copy of my own works because of Nina. I'm tearing up just thinking about it. Never have I been given such a thoughtful gift. And it's yellow, too!! (I love yellow.) (Also I'm a Hufflepuff, if the "puff" in "danpuff" didn't give it away.)
Certain Dark Things
LilaDiurne's Certain Dark Things is an incredible story and the book Nina created for it is so gorgeous! Geez Louise, what a rockstar!
Drabbles:
Hunger
Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 196.
Severus is a gourmet.
No pretty Girl
Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 297. Hate sex.
Snape is a terrible liar.
Fics:
Feline Felicis
Harry/Severus. Rated: M. Words: 10,708. Cat!Harry. Fluff.
Potter, in a fit of being his usual hazardous self, goes about things in all the wrong ways. Of course it falls to Severus to fix the mess. It goes not at all as expected.
The Ferryman
Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 7,021. Mental health issues.
A story about ghosts and Psychopomps, and two men who might be better off together.
Set Phasers to Stun
Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 18,580. Fluff & smut. Humor. Headmaster Snape & Professor Potter. Snarry Swap 2021.
Harry returns to Hogwarts to apprentice under none other than Severus Snape as a Star Trek: Voyager craze hits the school. Harry is soon to find out that he, in fact, does like sci-fi ― and Vulcans.
Podfic:
Boxes & Baubles
written by me! Narrated by Nina. Severus-centric. Lily & Severus friendship. Minor Regulus/Severus. Endgame Harry/Severus. Rated: T. Length: 21 minutes.
Christmas trees over the first four (and a half) decades of Severus’ life.
Poem:
Lovers' Flight
Harry/Severus. Rated: T. Words: 221. MCD. Wartime. Poem. Kill Your Darlings Fest 2022. Inspired by "Elf King" by Goethe.
When Goethe meets Snarry
Webcomic
Quarantine Days
Harry/Severus. Rated: M. Muggle Au. Domestic fluff. Fluff & smut. Snarry AUctober Fest 2021.
A collection of three-panel comics about Harry and Severus stuck at home during quarantine.
for an explanation about Mutuals March, or to figure out why i wrote you a thing, please check out this post.
#mutuals march#pinanaponi#danni goes overboard cuz she loves nina so much#must give all the love to bestie#why are my friends so dang talented????#sheesh
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I haven’t been in the star trek fandom for very long (I’ve only just started binging the series in the last couple months), so it’s been pretty surprising to find out just how negative the perception of the reboot movies are.
this isn’t coming from the perspective of someone who grew up with the series, so it hit different for me than it might for people with a different relationship to TOS, but I thought it was genuinely clever and Respectful with how it was handled.
To quote leonard nimoy: “Well the alternative timeline gives them license to escape from canon concerns. I can’t see people saying ‘they shouldn’t do that because…’ or ‘that doesn’t tie in to such and such’ because it is a different time and place. Am I right about that?” [Link]
the entire Premise is that the original series happened as it was presented in TOS, but an event late in Spock’s life caused the creation of a parallel universe in which everyone’s lives were significantly altered through two key changes to the timeline. this gives them the freedom to Both revel in fanservice And explore different facets of the characters and their relationships.
the destruction of vulcan Vastly impacts the characters and the plot moving forward, and its a detail that a lot of people take issue with. but the emotional impact of sarek admitting Directly to spock that there is value in his humanity, that his feelings Aren’t wrong, that sarek married amanda because he Loved her cannot be understated. you can read all of these things into sarek as he was in the original series, but he Never had an open conversation about these things with spock. this creates a Believable and Rewarding change in their relationship, where we get to see a different facet of them Because of the changes made. and that’s exactly the appeal. showing us pieces of these characters that we never got in TOS that are nevertheless undeniably Them.
everyone is Different yes, but they’re also fundamentally the same people at their core and that matters.
kirk’s personality obviously takes the biggest change, with him experiencing trauma at a young age, losing his father, and having an implied abusive father figure after that point. he has a harsher personality in reaction to harsher conditions, he’s spikier and harder to love. but he’s also still fundamentally a Good person whose willing to risk everything to help people. he still has what made kirk prime a good captain and a good friend.
I’m not gonna say that it’s the most nuanced story in the world, but it explores a version of kirk that was born from even Less fortunate circumstances than kirk prime, exploring a kirk brimming with potential who learned to bite back after he was kicked down. exploring those themes of trauma and loss, of insecurity and growth, and coming to the conclusion that Fundamentally He Is Capable Of Good isn’t a Bad thing. you don’t have to like it, but his growth into a better person is The Point. they deepened his flaws (all of which were present in a less exaggerated form in TOS) To Show That Growth.
and then of course there’s his relationship with spock.
people are totally justified in not liking that they had a rough start to their relationship, I usually don’t like to see that kind of thing in reboots or hollywood adaptations either, but the way people talk about it is just unfair.
Yes kirk and spock and bones have a very strong relationship in TOS, they also already know each other by the time the show starts. to look at them having to learn to get to know and trust each other when they first meet and say that it’s Bad because they were already full on ride or die for each other in the og series is silly. TOS kirk and spock had to meet and fall in love with each other too, it didn’t just happen over night kings.
secondly, the entire point of the first movie is that Even With reality itself being altered to pull them apart they are fundamentally compatible people that are Bound to each other. they meet each other on bad terms because of circumstances outside of their control, and yet they’re still pulled into each other’s orbit and find the other slotting into place next to them as if they always belonged. one of the first things that spock prime says in the movie is “I am and always will be your friend,” spock and jim are Meant for each other and the movie goes out of its way to explain that. which is what makes it so Weird to see people complaining about how they don’t like each other.
it’s a Different relationship, but it’s absolutely no less steeped in yearning or queer subtext.
speaking of queer subtext ! some people are Very unhappy with spock’s relationship with uhura.
first thing I wanna say is that making the argument that they’re doing anything that the original series hasn’t done is just, completely untrue. kirk has fallen in love with more girls in the og series than he knew what to do with, leonard nimoy was a heartthrob in his time (and he deserves it, awooga) and spock reflects that ! Spock usually turns the women who come onto him down (or when he doesn’t it’s because a plant has literally altered his mind), but there are exceptions to even that. all of three of the main boys have plenty of romance subplots, it happens. if that takes the possibility of them being queer off the table for you (which it shouldn’t, m-spec people exist) then I’m sorry to say that TOS is not exempt.
now, I can understand why Specifically This Relationship could rub people the wrong way or being disappointed that they didn’t outright depict kirk and spock as having a relationship (if not in the first movie then in the following ones after they’ve gotten to know each other), but even in that context the way I’ve seen people talk about it comes off as insensitive.
no, the relationship did not come out of nowhere. they considered having spock and uhura date each other in the original show (and you can see signs of this in the earlier episodes, where uhura very obviously flirts with him and they spend time together in their down time) before they decided against it, and spock was originally going to kiss uhura until shatner insisted that he wanted to do it (because it was the first interracial kiss on tv). [Link 1, Link 2, Link 3]
nichelle nichols was asked about this exact thing (spock and uhura’s relationship in the movie), you can read the interview in full here [Link] but I’d like to highlight this paragraph in particular:
“Now, go back to my participation in Star Trek as Uhura and Leonard (Nimoy) as Spock. There was always a connection between Uhura and Spock. It was the early 60’s, so you couldn’t do what you can do now, but if you will remember, Uhura related to Spock. When she saw the captain lost in space out there in her mirror, it was Spock who consoled her when she went screaming out of her room. When Spock needed an expert to help save the ship, you remember that Uhura put something together and related back to him the famous words, “I don’t know if I can do this. I’m afraid.” And Uhura was the only one who could do a spoof on Spock. Remember the song (in “Charlie X”)? Those were the hints, as far as I’m concerned.”
the film makers looked at the fact there were Hints for uhura and spock, that they were Interested in exploring an interracial couple for the first time (both before and immediately after interracial couples won the right to legally get married) but Couldn’t because of the circumstances of the times and decided to Make that depiction. you don’t have to Like their relationship just because of that fact, but it’s Incredibly reductive to play down it’s significance as just a No Homo cop out. explicitly queer relationships are not the only progressive or culturally important relationships in fiction.
moreover, if you can’t imagine polyamory in the communist utopian future that’s on you.
moreover, this perception that this was a soulless cash grab is just, unfounded.
leonard nimoy returned to the role as spock for the first time in 16 years (since 1991) and this was Entirely because of the respect they had for nimoy, spock as a character, and the franchise as a whole.
Lets look at some quotes from nimoy in interviews regarding the film:
Leonard Nimoy: When I first read the script (...) I immediately contacted J.J. and said “I think it is terrific…I think you guys have done a wonderful job. There is still work to be done, but it is very clear that you and your writers know what you are doing and you know how to do this movie and know what it should be about….and I am very interested.” Then as time went by we worked things out with Paramount, but the most important things were J.J. and the script. (...) I am very pleased about that and I am very comfortable with where this is going. I think the writers have done a terrific job. They have a real sense of the characters and the heart of Star Trek and what it is really all about.
(...)
TrekMovie.com: Now in the case of the new movie you have been retired from acting for years. What was it about this one that made you want to act again and go through the make up again? What was it that made you say ‘I really want to do this?’
Leonard Nimoy: You are right, this is a special situation. First it is Star Trek and so I have to pay attention. I owe that to Star Trek. Second place is that it is J.J. Abrams who I think very highly of, he is a very talented guy. Then came the script and it was very clear that I could make a contribution here. The Spock character that I am playing, the original Spock character, is essential and important to the script. So on the basis of those three elements it was easy to make the decision. So those three things: Star Trek, J.J. Abrams, and an interesting Spock role.
[Link]
Praising the cast playing younger versions of characters from the original 1960s TV series, he [Leonard Nimoy] said: “Let me take the opportunity to say this. Everybody at this table [the cast] are very, very talented and intelligent people.”
“They found their own way to bring that talent and intelligence to this movie, and I think it shows. (...) When Karl Urban introduced himself as Leonard McCoy and shook hands with Chris Pine, I burst into tears. That performance of his is so moving, so touching and so powerful as Doctor McCoy, that I think D. Kelley would be smiling, and maybe in tears as well.”
“The makers of this film reawakened the passion in me that I had when we made the original film and series. I was put back in touch with what I cared about and liked about Star Trek, and why I enjoyed being involved with Star Trek. So, it was an easy way to come on home.”
“[In this Star Trek] they said things and showed me things, and demonstrated the sensibility that I felt very comfortable with, and I think that shows in the movie. I like it.”
[Link 1, Link 2]
again, you don’t have to like it just because leonard nimoy did, you don’t have to Agree. but the idea that nobody working on the film Cared is provably false. near everyone working on the project was already a fan of the series or were excited to be involved and did their homework. it’s genuinely a Miracle just how much of a labor of love this was, and in my opinion you can feel that through the movie itself. I’d highly recommend looking into interviews and behind the scenes details about the movies. they had a respect not just for the source material, but for leonard nimoy as a person.
there’s definitely more I Could say about this, but it’s 4 am now so I’m gonna shelve it jklfdsa
that said! it’s Fine to not like the movie, not everything is going to be suited to everyone’s taste, but the specific criticisms I’ve seen feel very off base
#star trek#kirk#spock#uhura#nichelle nichols#leonard nimoy#star trek aos#aos#star trek tos#tos#meta#long post#hello followers I write essays about star trek now
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Star Trek: The Characters
Storytelling, especially where it regards movies and television, is always evolving.
Whether it’s in deeper themes, better effects, different genres, or evolving archetypes, there is always something that is changing, except, perhaps, where the importance of characters are concerned.
Characters are an integral part of storytelling, particularly where it concerns television. When it comes to television, the setup is everything, and the characters are part of that setup, that ‘home base’ that the audience returns to at the start of every episode. The characters are the people that the audience gets to know, who star in each adventure. Characters are what holds the audience’s investment, the reason fanbases tolerate bad episodes and praise good ones. In the end, the main characters keep an audience’s attention, making each episode, even the bad ones, enjoyable.
In short, characters can make or break a television show. It is vital that they be likable, or at the very least, interesting, lest the audience utter those eight deadly words:
I Don’t Care What Happens To These People.
Once those words are uttered, it doesn’t matter how gripping your narratives are. The viewers will start to leave.
See, while a film can get away with some lesser characters by distracting with an interesting concept, set-piece or a fast-paced story, television can’t. Thanks to a smaller runtime and a smaller budget, television, by necessity, tends to be character based. As a result, the main cast of a television show has to be able to work in multiple stories of different kinds.
This means that writing for characters on television can be pretty difficult.
The best television characters tend to merge two ideas together: That of relatability and entertainment value.
You see, television, like all stories, tells stories of exaggerated versions of reality, especially in the cases of science-fiction adventure shows like Star Trek. The only way to make an audience buy an unbelievable world is to create believable characters to place in that world, that relatability in the stories and characters. When we see McCoy’s frustration, or Kirk’s boldness, or Spock’s reservedness, we see elements of ourselves, our own personalities and lives. It is vital to make characters seem real, if not realistic.
The question is, does Star Trek manage to do that?
That’s the question we’re going to be answering today. Let’s take a look, starting with the Captain of the Enterprise Crew: James Tiberius Kirk.
Kirk truly was The Captain in every sense of the word. A Reasonable Authority Figure who did far more adventuring than realistic counterparts would have, Kirk was an Action Man, level-headed, dutiful, and always loyal to his ship and his crew. A Bold Explorer (it’s in the job description), Kirk, while not fearless per say, took the Chains of Commanding quite seriously, and would often face down hugely powerful beings, power-mad computers, or other forces beyond him in order to save his crew. A Determinator to the last, known for his interesting ways to think outside the box and refusal to accept a ‘no win scenario��, he is the unquestionable Hero of the show, the Leader, who often throws the rules aside to do what he feels is right, in a constant battle To Be Lawful or Good. He was a Charmer, an expert fast-talker, and very smart. In later installations of the franchise, Kirk would become a Living Legend, much as he became in our own pop culture.
All that being said, the common cultural image of Captain Kirk isn’t quite right. Allow me to adjust it, as best I can.
More than any other character in Star Trek, or perhaps the history of television in general, Captain Kirk is possibly the most misrepresented character of all time. Since the ‘60s, Kirk has evolved into an icon of heroism, machismo, and brash boldness, with even the recent Star Trek reboot depicting, not Kirk, but rather, the distorted, separate idea of Kirk in the modern light.
This idea, quite frankly, is just not right. While Kirk did have his share of romances, he was no womanizer, often entering into dubiously consented-to relationships reluctantly, in order to save the ship. The relationships he did actively pursue, he threw himself into wholeheartedly, and he was just as crushed as the other party every time they fell apart (for proof, watch City on the Edge of Forever or The Paradise Syndrome). Kirk was no player. As a matter of fact, he was a deeply compassionate man who respected the women in his life as much as he respected Spock and McCoy. It just so happened that the women in his life tended to not stick around, unlike his one true love: The Enterprise.
Even his reputation of the ‘Cowboy Captain’ isn’t accurate. As I mentioned before, Kirk was defined by compassion. His moments of ‘rule-breaking’ wasn’t to impose ‘the way he thinks things should be’, it’s because Kirk cannot bear to watch helpless people in trouble. The few times where he does break the famous ‘Prime Directive’ (To not interfere with less developed races) is to help. Kirk was a deeply moral character, determined to not stand by while people were taken advantage of. He wasn’t rash, either. While it may be accurate to say that the ship’s doctor, Leonard McCoy, was a bit on the hot-headed side, it is entirely inaccurate to accuse Kirk of the same. Kirk was an extremely smart man, a level-headed captain who was an expert at thinking fast. He trusted his instincts, but he trusted his advisors too, often finding a balance between McCoy’s impulsiveness and Spock’s cold rationality. Kirk’s intelligence and competence is often lost, overshadowed by his more extreme companions, and some audiences have forgotten the truth of Kirk’s character: a cunning problem-solver capable of saving the day under enormous pressure, whose decisions are far from based in irrationality. He is a romantic, duty-bound to protect his ship and crew, greatly exaggerated and mis-characterized in the years following his captaincy.
As such, Kirk was a well-rounded, balanced character, far more three-dimensional than the modern idea of him tends to give him credit for.
That’s all well and good, sure, but how does he fit as a main character in a television show?
As a matter of fact, absolutely incredibly.
Kirk serves as a wonderfully effective lead, compelling, entertaining, and interesting. Infinitely more developed than most leads of his time, and even more modern examples, Kirk was a game-changer, a revolutionary kind of protagonist who just worked. The perfect balance of the main trio of the series, Kirk is the perfect face for Roddenberry’s ideals: a hopeful pragmatist, an idealist who proves the best of humanity: compassion mixed with intelligence, boldness combined with understanding. A man of action surrounded by True Companions, Kirk was an extremely gripping protagonist who felt intensely, a perfect person for the audience to connect to and be invested in. He drove the stories, opposed the villains, and always saved the crew, as a hero should, but it’s important to note that Kirk was hugely human, possessing many of our greatest attributes, but some of our failings as well. He wasn’t perfect. Sometimes he made the wrong choice. In the end, though, he was us, or us as we should strive to be: always learning and helping, and always reaching for the stars.
But of course, Kirk wasn’t alone in his position as the ‘lead’ of the show. It’s doubtful the show would have survived in the popular culture as well as it did if it weren’t for his support team, his True Companions: Dr. Leonard McCoy, and, more famously: Mr. Spock.
If Kirk represented the best of humanity, Spock represented the critique of it. In a previous article, I pointed out that Spock exists as a very unique character: a half alien, half human crewmember who, while equally valuable to the script and the characters as Kirk was, served a different purpose: to point out and explore humanity from the outside.
Like I’ve mentioned before, Spock is a different sort of character than Kirk is. Where Kirk is a demonstration of the best of humanity as we see it, Spock is a demonstration of humanity as someone else might. He served as a criticism of the human condition, a character at war with himself and his heritage, split between the emotional humans, and the rational Vulcans. Spock is the Number One, almost Comically Serious as he eschews his more illogical half and chooses to embrace the stoicism of the Vulcan people. A Gentleman and a Scholar, Spock has Hidden Depths, a heart of gold and deep emotions that he usually succeeds in hiding.
Most of the time. More on that in a minute.
Spock’s role in the show was The Smart Guy, the Stoic who had all the answers, all the statistics. He was the champion of impartial logic, of cold rationality. His job was to give Kirk the hard answers, to bring to him the facts and give him their options, especially the unforgiving ones. He is the cold to McCoy’s hot, a stern-faced, cold-blooded computer.
Or is he?
Much like Kirk, there is a lot more to Spock than meets the eye. While the cultural perception of Spock has often mutated into a parody of itself, much as it has done to Kirk’s reputation, Spock remains a much deeper character than he, or a brief skim of the series, lets on. As I said earlier, Spock is at war with himself, uncomfortable in his own skin. He insults humans for their humanity, but has strong, deep friendships with them. He is not above expressing frustration and their emotional natures when pushed (usually by other forces that knock his guard down), but isn’t frustration a human emotion?
Spock is a bag of contradictions, a supposedly emotionless master of sarcasm, a man without feeling who invites his close friends (emotional humans) to a private Vulcan ceremony, a cold-blooded creature with undying loyalty who occasionally makes ‘illogical’ decisions that would make Kirk proud. A lover of music and a sympathizer to space hippies (Not one of Star Trek’s better episodes, admittedly), Spock was an outsider who fit neither fully as a Vulcan or Human, a person who was struggling to find his place in the universe.
At first, this seems incongruous with the ice-cold exterior he projects, however, rather than being an example of inconsistent writing, it’s a shining example of development and nuance.
You see, Spock never gives up his following of logic. He just begins to approach it differently.
Spock’s style changes slightly as Star Trek progresses (most notably in the films, released ten years after the show’s final season), from cold, ‘computer’ logic to something else: human logic.
One thing of especial note in the original Star Trek show is that you could see characters visibly affecting one another. Kirk, Spock and McCoy all influenced each other in the ways they thought, reacted, and planned, and worked best as a unit. In this, the humanity of the main cast affected Spock in his slow, reluctant appreciation of human merits. In time, Spock began to make one or two decisions based on human logic, intelligence and emotion. In episodes like The Menagerie or The Galileo Seven, Spock makes decisions that seem out-of-character for him, based in emotion.
Spock is, in many ways, Star Trek’s best known and favorite character. The most visibly recognizable, as well as the most distinct, Spock is given more episodes exploring him than any other character, with installments like Amok Time and Journey to Babel, (the latter of which we explore his parents, and discover why it is that Spock has such a hard time with his human half) helping to examine Spock as a character.
The end result was a beloved science fiction icon, Kirk’s right hand man, an analytical, fascinating character as well-crafted and loved as Kirk himself.
Spock and Kirk are often remembered fondly, and are typically considered the most memorable and iconic characters of the franchise, but they don’t work alone. Their dynamic is as effective as it is because of balance. Spock is one extreme, and Kirk is the middle, but it’s no good without the other extreme: Dr. Leonard Horatio “Bones” McCoy.
McCoy is all hot-blooded human, the third of the main Power Trio. An old-fashioned competent doctor who wasn’t entirely thrilled with deep space, McCoy is a deeply emotional character, duty-bound to follow his morals. He clashed with Spock regularly, routinely criticizing him for his perceived lack of emotion. Despite the fighting, McCoy respected Spock greatly, counting him as a close friend, despite their arguments and different perspectives. A cantankerous pacifist (though not above getting into the action when needed), McCoy is a Super Doc and a Sarcastic Devotee, a Grumpy Old Man who serves as the Heart to Spock’s Brain (hah!), a man who values Honor Before Reason who values the Good Old Ways. He’s a Determined Doctor who does everything he can for his patients, and a Deadpan Snarker to the point where he can match Spock in verbal sparring.
Bones represents the unpolished rawness of humanity, getting carried away with his emotions sometimes, but always with the best intentions. Another Jerk with a Heart of Gold, McCoy’s gruff nature accompanied a deeply moral man, very concerned with human empathy and doing the right thing. No philosophical discussion was complete without McCoy’s two cents, telling Kirk what he thought the right thing to do was. He was the quintessential Knight in Sour Armor, who would follow Kirk to the ends of the earth, complaining the entire way.
Despite the fact that he’s not as well-known as the other two members of the Power Trio, Bones was a vital component to the True Companions dynamic. His Vitriolic Best Buds relationship with Spock made up one of the most interesting and compelling dynamics on the show, serving as perfect counterbalances to one another. However, although his most famous role in the show was arguing with Spock (and delivering phrases such as ‘He’s Dead, Jim’), there is another, equally important position that he held in the trio.
McCoy served as a foil to Kirk, as well as one to Spock, a confidante, a close friend, providing perspective. While Spock was focused on the logic, Kirk on the best thing for the mission, McCoy’s focus was purely on the ‘patients’, the people, the right thing to do. No matter the situation, McCoy was the closest to empathy with the people involved, and provided the audience with another surrogate, saying the things that the viewers are thinking.
While not being a terribly big fan of space (and liking transporters even less), Bones was the epitome of the Frontier Doctor to the stars, taking care of every patient, even if they weren’t humanoid (Devil in the Dark) or a heavily pregnant woman who refuses to listen (Friday’s Child). McCoy was painfully human, reminding us of our most problematic traits while also holding onto that wild, fiery compassion that made him so incredibly humane, relatable, and understandable, making him just as vital to the Enterprise and her crew as Kirk or Spock.
The trio worked best together, providing a perfect main cast for an audience to follow. The formula was an interesting one, allowing the audience to hear separate viewpoints and ideas, listen in to the philosophical banter, and truly feel the strong friendship holding the leads together. The dynamic between them was powerful, an extremely vibrant bond that connected all three very different characters.
The result? Extremely dynamic characters that remain iconic and memorable even to this day.
But the cast didn’t stop there.
The other characters of Star Trek, while not quite possessing the pop-culture iconography of the main trio, still hold their own rather impressive cultural footprint.
None more so than the chief engineer, Montgomery Scott.
Scotty’s job was to be a miracle worker, solving impossible problems in impossibly small amounts of time. Whether it was the transporters, the phaser banks, the shields, or the engines, Scotty was the man for the job. Nobody had a better understanding, or love for the Enterprise than Scotty (except maybe Kirk). He was the king of outside-the-box solutions, and had the Enterprise jury-rigged to push her past her limits more times than can be easily counted. As the name implies, he was also Scottish, and extremely stereotypically so. Kilt, whiskey, haggis and all, Scotty was extremely proud of his heritage (though not quite as much as Chekov). Fitting the traditional stereotypes, Scotty had a fiery temper, with a Berserk Button triggered by any insult to the Enterprise. A Gadgeteer Genius (and the inventor of Scotty Time) as well as a Genius Bruiser, Scotty was both the brains and brawn, more than capable of holding his own in a fight, or thinking of a new, creative way to push the Enterprise past her capacity.
Scotty also held the distinction of being third in command, routinely taking the Captain’s chair when both Kirk and Spock were in the landing party. He was also the focus of a few episodes, making him a rare character with a Day in the Limelight, with episodes such as Wolf in the Fold, The Lights of Zetar, By Any Other Name, and The Trouble with Tribbles giving him a little more screen time and story than is typical. Scotty was an indispensable member of the crew, a life-saver on more than one occasion, and another of the legendary, iconic characters of the original Star Trek.
But it didn’t stop there.
Lieutenant Nyota Uhura was another prominent character. As the ship’s communications officer, she codified the term ‘Bridge Bunny’, although she proved herself far more useful than she’s typically thought of. Whenever given the chance, Uhura is a capable Action Girl, intelligent, witty, and good at her job, being extremely fluent in multiple languages. She too got her days in the limelight, with episodes such as Mirror Mirror, The Gamesters of Triskelion, and The Trouble with Tribbles giving her more to do than just sit at her station and say ‘hailing frequencies open’. Uhura was Silk Hiding Steel, not typically in the heat of the battle, but tough as nails when she had to be. (I’ve talked about Uhura’s extensive influence on the real world in the Legacy article, but even that doesn’t scratch the surface of what Uhura’s impact has been.)
There were others on the bridge crew of equal importance, including the ship’s helmsman, Hikaru Sulu.
Sulu was a level-headed officer, amiable and cultured, with an extensive knowledge of botany, fencing, and antiques. Yet another Deadpan Snarker (it must run in the cast), Sulu is another Genius Bruiser, as skilled in fighting as he is in his piloting, with a great sense of humor. He is given special attention in episodes like Mirror Mirror and The Naked Time (Albeit as evil, and Brainwashed and Crazy), but often got great character moments in multiple episodes (especially Shore Leave). A reliable officer and loyal to the core, he made an interesting character by himself, although he did end up forming a fun ‘Those Two Guys’ dynamic with the youngest of the cast, Pavel Chekov.
Chekov was introduced in season 2 as the navigator of the Enterprise. A bright young man with a fierce, passionate loyalty to Mother Russia (which evidently invented every good thing known to man), Chekov tended to be at the receiving end of a lot of the embarrassing agony in the series (mostly because Walter Koenig had a great scream). Also serving as a relief science officer, Chekov was plenty smart, if a bit of a Cloudcuckoolander, and the king of Cultural Posturing. Reckless and impulsive to balance Sulu’s calm good humor, Chekov’s temper tended to get the better of him. Like the others, he’s given a bit more screen time in episodes such as Mirror Mirror, The Trouble with Tribbles, The Way to Eden, The Deadly Years and Spectre of the Gun, but got to shine in plenty of other episodes, demonstrating his capabilities (despite being ‘The Intern’ and the Plucky Comic Relief) as a competent officer. Unsurprisingly, he was yet another Deadpan Snarker, lending his style of jokes well to bounce off of Sulu’s drier humor.
But there was more to the crew than the bridge.
Another crew member of note was Christine Chapel, one of the nurses who operated in the sickbay. Chapel was notable for having an attraction to Spock, as well as being another in the long line of Enterprise Deadpan Snarkers. One of the most caring of the Enterprise’s crew, Chapel was given larger roles in episodes like The Naked Time, What Are Little Girls Made Of?, Amok Time, and Plato’s Stepchildren.
Arguably though, one of the most important characters in all of Star Trek was the Companion Cube: the Enterprise herself.
The Enterprise was one of the most powerful ships in Starfleet, a character in her own right. The epitome of the Cool Starship, the Enterprise was well known for Explosive Overclocking, and always coming through in the end (with a little help from Scotty). A Lightning Bruiser of a ship, the Enterprise became as legendary as her captain and crew, as beloved as the characters themselves to the point where one of NASA’s shuttles was named after her.
The characters of Star Trek are legends, both in and out of universe, and they are for a reason. No member of the crew is useless. Everyone has a purpose and a job to do, and each was distinct and unique. No two characters were the same, and each brought their own special personality and abilities to each episode they appeared in.
And that’s what made the drama of the show work so well.
Each character felt real, memorable and genuine. We as an audience worry for them with each danger, and cheer with each victory. We liked these people. We cared about what happened to them.
And they worked.
In each scenario and situation, the characters found new and interesting ways to deal with the circumstances, while never losing the core elements of their personalities. That’s important, hugely so. These characters were loved, and still are, for a reason. They work very well as characters, both in main and supporting roles, providing entertaining and compelling figures for the audience to invest in. The balance between relatability and entertainment was hit perfectly for every single character, allowing everyone to shine in their own ways in each episode. They felt real, and in the end, that’s the point of a character.
After all, one doesn’t get to be some of the most iconic television characters of all time by being boring.
Thank you guys so much for reading! Join us next time as we discuss Star Trek’s place in the times and the culture. If you have anything you’d like to say, don’t forget to leave an ask! I hope to see you all in the next article.
#Star Trek: The Original Series#Star Trek#TV#Television#TV-PG#60s#Drama#Action#Adventure#Sci-Fi#Science Fiction#William Shatner#Leonard Nimoy#DeForest Kelley#James Doohan#Nichelle Nichols#George Takei#Walter Koenig#Majel Barrett#Gene Roddenberry
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1. How did you start shipping Spones?
I started shipping spones when I somehow got it into my head that Spock would have an irrational desire to pick McCoy up and carry him around! I think adestroy’s comics first introduced me to the concept of spones, and it didn’t hurt that the first episode of TOS that I ever saw was All Our Yesterdays lol
Great spones fics (Surgeon’s Mate by belmanoir springs to mind), regular content from sleepymccoy throughout 2015-2017 or so, and excellent fanvids on YouTube by Danzinora Switch all helped to keep me interested in the ship.
2. Why did you ship them?
My “true” ship is McSpirk, but the great thing that the spones relationship has over the spirk relationship is the tension. Spones has what every romcom wants (and usually fails) to have: two people who are clearly well-matched for each other in terms of intellect, ideals, lifestyle and personality, but who have got off on the wrong foot due to relatively minor differences in temperament, mode of expression, prejudices and insecurities.
This tension can be played equally well for comedy and for angst. Furthermore, they are both such honest and loyal people that a serious meaningful relationship is totally plausible, opening up possibilities for fluff or epic romance. So you can have anything you want, with spones!
Also (unlike Kirk, unlike Spock), McCoy simply will not experience fulfilment without marriage. He is lonely and his career and friendships cannot fully sate that loneliness. He needs total commitment to and from one person. And Spock is the best match for him.
3. What are some reasons you like Spock and McCoy as characters?
Well I only fell into the Star Trek fandom because of Leonard Nimoy’s expressive face! Spock has remained my favourite character because I admire his stoicism, his utter integrity, his deadpan wit; and I relate to his reticence, awkwardness and (imo) demisexuality.
It took me a while to really like McCoy. In the show, the writers sometimes didn’t do the character justice, and the spones arguments don’t always make sense. But the fandom has really developed McCoy’s character as it was meant to be and as DeForest Kelley portrayed him. I love his sass, his selflessness, his mistrust of space and technology, the way he covers up his deep emotions with cantankerousness and surface emotions.
Above all, the great thing about McCoy from a shipper’s point of view is his boundless potential for pining! He breaks his own heart at the slightest provocation – which means he has limitless potential for bliss once things work out in the end.
4. Some of your fave things about liking Spones: tropes, fics, headcanons etc?
I like that spones works particularly well as an AU. Now normally I don’t even like AUs. With spirk, for instance, I can’t stand AUs because they can never be better than the actual spirk relationship in TOS, so what’s the point?
With spones, though, it seems as though TOS is almost the worst possible outcome, as though Spock and McCoy would, in any other universe or circumstances, have come together more quickly, easily and completely? So whether it’s a completely different AU (like Regency era or cowboys or something) or just a “what if this episode had gone a little differently” AU, there’s endless scope.
I’m sorry for the late reply! I saw this submission in the inbox but, before I could do anything, my power went out for days so I’m now just taking a chance to look at your answers!
That is a hell of an introduction to Spones! All Our Yesterdays has a lot of Spones content, Adestroy has such great comics, but when sleepymccoy made all that spones content from 2014-2017, it actually was one of the reasons I actually made a tumblr. Danzinora Switch’s videos are WONDERFUL but honestly her fics? Such good gen fic I’m cry. I can see how you got sucked into the Spones very quickly.
I, too, love McSpirk! (My multishipping butt collects ships like no one’s business lmao) You do make a great point about Spones having what most romcom movies want but don’t always succeed at with their main interests.
You are so very right about the writer’s not always doing justice to McCoy’s character (sometimes they write him antithesis to what has been established AS his character in other episodes -- I’ve discussed this before with Trek-Tracks, but Bev and I agreed that some of these writers would write Spock & McCoy as opposites, even on positions that would definitely be very out of character for McCoy, if it meant it was the “opposite” of what Spock was presenting, and it’s just very frustrating) and the amount of thought Deforest Kelley put into McCoy is quite amazing (I have a press release where he talks really in-depth about it, it’s a wonderful read!) and it’s nicer that fans have seen through some of that OOC bs and came up what maybe they were trying to establish with him at the time but didn’t always succeed.
And yes, to the boundless potential for McCoy angst, whump and pining. Goodness.
You have a good point about AUs! They really do work well transposed into all kinds of AUs (I know, I’ve accumulated to many in my fic wips lmao) which is a shame because there aren’t enough AU fics for this pair. In recent years, I’ve started to see more of them, but there is definitely room for more!
It’s been awhile since I’ve read Surgeon’s Mate, but I remembered it to be pretty good, and if anyone wants to read it, you can find it on AO3 here. I do remember it’s a pretty “old” fic, like 2011? 2012? It’s been awhile.
If you like Danzinora Switch’s fanvids, I think y’all would enjoy the gen fics. The fics are SUCH a joy to read, especially like that one where Spock & McCoy time travel to Vulcan’s past. It can be all found and read here, on fanfiction.net.
#submission#beastlyanachronism#spones#fic rec#i totally didn't ignore it actually seeing this in the inbox makes me SO HAPPY#i should run another ask time thing like this again it was fun to see y'all's responses
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Harper’s 2020 Fic Wrap-Up
my very good friend and incredibly talented felow writer @sagemoderocklee came up with the idea of doing an end of the year fic wrapup in an attempt to polish the turd known as 2020, and since i actually managed to get some writing done this year i figured, why not jump on the bandwagon?
a lot of super duper fucking shitty things happened in 2020, but i will always be proud that in this incredibly chaotic, stressful, and challenging year i managed to produce almost 180k of content (and that’s not even counting the writing i started in 2020 but haven’t published yet). so, to celebrate what’s been a pretty big achievement for me, i wanted to go through the various projects i’ve spent the last twelve months working on and give a preview of my plans for 2021.
let’s jump in!
projects i worked on/completed in 2020:
first off, let’s start with the beast to end all beasts, my personal baby, and honestly probably the reason most people follow me -- star trek au:
something bigger than the sky (shiita; 44,163 words; completed):
i’ve said this before, but the whole idea for star trek au was literally just a joke between me and my-then girlfriend, now-fiancee, and eternal shiita enabler alexa aka @durintrash (by the way, if you follow me for my fics and you DON’T follow alexa for her corresponding art WHAT, exactly, are you doing with your life????) where i sat in a space-themed diner and said ‘haha imagine itachi as a vulcan.’ but then i blinked and suddenly somehow i’d written the prologue and the first chapter of SBTTS in the span of a week. it’s like i was possessed by a fanfic demon.
it sounds super cheesy but i honestly can’t say enough how important this fic has been to me and how much it’s pushed me to be a more productive and more dedicated writer. previously i spent a lot of time Thinking about writing and occasionally i’d put a few words on the page and then i’d go... do... something... else. but star trek au was the first idea i loved enough that it actually pushed me to write and keep writing and not give up even when i was confronted with things like writer’s block and worry over the quality of my writing. so thank you, star trek au, for being the light in a very dark year for me.
by the end of SBTTS, i felt like i accomplished everything i wanted to do with the story’s beginning installment: i introduced all the characters and set the groundwork for their development; i showed what life on the corvus was like and how starfleet, the federation, and the universe functioned; and, more than anything, i was able to sketch out both the main protagonists -- itachi and shisui -- with all their strengths and flaws, show their relationship to one another, and hint at how that relationship would progress.
all the stars are closer (shiita; 75,195 words; completed)
considering how slow i used to be at writing, i thought it would be, like, twelve years before i managed to get to the second part in the series. BUT then covid happened and i half-lost, half-quit my job, and like a lot of people this year i ended up with a lot of free time on my hands. and so, like a fucking demon, i finished this part in two and a half months.
when i originally planned this part out, i really thought it would be a lot shorter and a lot lighter atmosphere-wise than it turned out. instead, this second section of the story ended up being pretty meaty in terms of length and in subject.
that said, overall, i’m really happy with how ATSAC turned out. i loved the way the characters progressed, how the relationships deepened, and how we were able to see this universe grow bigger and more complicated. and i’m very satisifed with how it set the stage for part three, which takes us to...
lovers alone wear sunlight (shiita; 41,518 words; in progress)
there’s... a lot about this part that i just can’t talk about yet, a) because it isn’t finished and b) because it contains some of the biggest plot points in the entire series thus far. if you’ve been keeping up with the stardates thus far (which i encourage you to do!) you know what part three is leading up to: itachi leaving the corvus and the dissolution of shisui and itachi’s growing relationship.
with that in mind, i’m... more than a little terrified about writing part three, which is why the third chapter has been languishing in my google drive for months now. (and also why i started not one, but TWO new fics to cope with my writer’s block. whoops.) chapter three is where all the parts come together and shit hits the fan, and i can only hope that everyone will be as excited to read it as i am to publish it.
next up, the two other projects i began this year:
salvation comes only in our dreams (shiita; canon divergence; 16,835 words; in progress)
for a long time, i’ve wanted to write something that’s actually set in the naruto universe and works to correct a lot of the flaws that i see in the series. there are a lot of things that bother me about naruto, but i think one of the things that frustrates me the most is the really messy and in some ways offensive resolution to the uchiha coup plot thread, and i wanted to write a story that dealt with the complicated themes of the series--imperialism, oppression, genocide, child soldiers--but, like, didn’t suck and completely drop the ball. thus, the massacre au was born.
my main goal was to tell a story that showed a lot of these characters in ways we’ve never seen them before, specifically itachi. i didn’t want to write itachi as just an idealist who suffers and Suffers AND SUFFERS for konoha yet still remains loyal to the village for some unfathomable reason like he is in the series. i wanted to write an itachi that was sharper, more jaded, and more suspicious of the world around him, but overall was still a good person with a kind heart. and for shisui, well... obviously there’s a lot going on there, too.
this is easily the darkest story i’ve ever written, and as the plot thickens it will certainly get darker with relationship dynamics that are complicated and unhealthy At Best. i hope that as the story goes on it’s a ride people continue to enjoy, as i was super pleasantly surprised at how popular this fic became (compared to my usual stats, at least)
oceans between us (shiita; alternate universe; 15,039 words; in progress)
it’s good to know that i continue to be the most ridiculously niche version of myself as yes, i wrote a fucking shiita atonement au.
with each fic i write i try to have a very specific voice that suits the particular piece and distinguishes it from other stories that include the same characters. for example, star trek au chapters tend to be more fun and light-hearted (especially shisui POV chapters) and lean more into the action movie and sci-fi adventure feel of the star trek universe, while the massacre au is written in a way that’s much heavier and guided by itachi’s emotions and experiences. my main goal with this story was to give it the same romantic, operatic, almost hazy quality that the movie has, which reflects the period setting and also the nature of this grand tragic love story.
i knew from the beginning that there were going to be a lot of things that i cut from the film in my retelling, like the lola subplot and obviously the setting of pre-wwii england. i also knew i wanted to explore some of the aspects of the film that were implied more than outright stated, like the themes of classism and upper-class privileges. and more than anything i wanted to structure this piece around this idea of tension building and building until it finally snaps and there’s just a world of mess and hurt and loss that affects these two characters in two very different ways.
also, the sex scene. i haven’t written a sex scene for anything in, like, a decade, so that was a lot of pressure. but i’m happy with how it came out and i think it ended up being an aspect of the story that felt like both a natural progression and necessary to show the affection these two people have for one another.
originally i was just going to end the story with shisui going to jail, but when i told alexa this i genuinely thought she was going to kill me. so, that didn’t happen lmao. but the more i tried to imagine what a second chapter would look like, the more i realized she was right, and it would have been a terrible idea to end the fic there. as for whether or not the final chapter will keep That Ending... who can say?
goals i have for 2021:
finishing lovers alone wear sunlight and, if i’m very lucky, beginning the fourth and second to last part of star trek au (yes, as it currently stands this 160k+ word series is only halfway finished. sorry not sorry)
publishing the next chapter of salvation comes only in our dreams (i don’t know when it will drop. i don’t know anything about this fic. please do not @ me)
completing oceans between us (the second and final chapter is currently sitting at about 4k words and will probably end up at about 15k in total)
completing and publishing a new fic i’ve started at the very end of 2020, which is the shiita jurassic world au nobody but me and alexa knew they wanted. it’s essentially a 90s romcom with dinosaurs and i cannot Wait to share it. (it’s at about 9k right now and will probably end up being around 20k to 23k in total... maybe...)
FINALLY starting my dream project: the shiita olympics au i’ve been planning for years, where itachi is a figure skater and shisui is a hockey player (i’d like to keep this under 150k but at this point trying to keep my stories at a managable word count is a losing battle)
anyway, that’s it! if you managed to get this far in this very self-indulgent and shameless bit of self promotion, congrats! also, a very big thank you to everyone who’s read my fics, left me kudos and comments, and spent their time on my work, because it really does mean the world to me.
here’s hoping 2021 is a much healthier and happier year for us all!
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April 25: 2x16 The Gamesters of Triskelion
Finally watched some more Star Trek. I feel like it’s been forever...
Today’s ep is The Gamesters of Triskelion, which is... okay. It’s not terrible but I think its best aspects are the most familiar: the type of alien, the moral values at play; and its weakest are its most unique.
I think Spock likes it when Kirk says “mind the store.” What a folksy human thing to say!
Plus now that he’s Captain he gets to sit in the chair.
This conversation between Spock and Scotty is hilarious. “I’m assuming you mean they disappeared in an unusual way??” “Uh, yeah?? Do you think I’m dumb?”
This alien looks like Lady Gaga c. 2010
Kirk is being very Dramatic today.
Come on, Spock, gotta get your man.
You know Spock is worried when he mentions hope. That is, as McCoy says, a human emotion.
“Collars of obedience.” Kinky.
Stylish pink jail.
I’m really feeling this Spock and Bones interaction today. That’s a great eyebrow lift.
If the random alien is leaving, Uhura must have been his ass down.
“Nourishment interval.” We need to bring this into our modern vocabulary.
Not one, but TWO ladies in command gold today (one at Communications, and one at Spock’s station).
Wild aquatic fowl.
I feel like this episode is another example of a writer putting her alien sex fantasy on television. Like, a hardcore alien sex fantasy. The obedience collars, the training harness, the whipping, the weird flirtation between Chekov and his “training thrall”--herself a very androgynous alien, just to throw some gender play in there.
Kirk turning up the charm again. I missed Charming!Kirk. I mean, picking up a silver platter to use as a mirror and saying “That’s beautiful”? This man has no shame.
I feel like this episode shows how Spock’s logic is actually a very effective life strategy. He’s facing a very mysterious situation with high stakes--literally his best friend/soulmate/captain lost, plus two more crewmen--but he isn’t defeatist like McCoy or defensive like Scotty. He just follows the evidence, even when the evidence seems wild. And he was right.
Detective Kirk time!
“Are they computers?” He’s hoping so, since he’s very good at defeating computerized enemies.
Could it be instead another example of aliens who have transcended their physical bodies?
He is really laying the charm offensive on thick here.
I get how people have vague memories of TOS and remember Kirk as slutty, because certainly there are lots of shots of him kissing ladies, but like... 90% of the time he's using charm as a weapon, like he doesn't like Lady Gaga, he just wants to get off this planet.
“Love, for one thing.” Time for Kirk to be a Romantic Nerd again. He sure does love love!!
See imo just as it’s ridiculous for him to limit love to being one of the most important things on Earth, since he barely even spends any time on Earth and his general thesis is about what all intelligent creatures can care about besides their basic needs being met by “Providers,” I think it’s silly to limit love to being between men and women. And just as he’s kinda lying about the Earth thing, I think he’s lying about the heterosexual thing.
People in love “live together, help each other, make each other happy.” I love his definitions of love!! Like with Edith, he center helping each other in the definition.
McCoy and Scotty think they can take on Spock lmao. The Captain’s life is at stake; he’s not fooling around. And he’s right too so y’all can shush!!
Honestly, that leaning down to talk quietly to them--I know it’s because he doesn’t want to say the word “mutiny” too loud where other people can hear him, but it really reads like he’s mocking them.
Shauhna is harassed at work.
Spock’s like ‘screw a landing party, I will retrieve my space husband by myself... and I guess McCoy can come too.’
McCoy’s voice was the one Kirk heard but he still calls out to Spock.
Mmm, yes, disembodied alien brains.
I like the painted background behind them, too. Which is apparently stolen from Devil in the Dark. S2 needs more painted backgrounds.
“You think YOU’RE competitive? A race that does nothing but gamble? Well you’ve never met humans lol.”
Since when has Kirk ever competed for a woman? Hardly a competition when he always wins.
“Fresh thrall” something so... ugh about that phrase.
Ah, yes, an Andorian.
I’m starting to feel like this is Spock’s Pre-Reform Vulcan Sex Fantasy.
I feel like Shauhna will eventually become the leader of the Triskellion people. My mom thinks it would be cool for Kirk to meet her again in the future. I feel like there’s a fanfic in there somewhere...
“I didn’t lie, I just...lied.”
Honestly, don’t bother leaving everything to these disembodied colorful brains, just take Shauhna with you and enlist her in Starfleet. Or at least, like, high school.
...And after all that she STILL has a crush on Kirk. The man is too powerful.
What, no return to the Enterprise? No Kirk appearing shirtless on the bridge? No everyone acknowledges that Spock was right the whole time? No awkward little joking time?
I guess perhaps Kirk is embarrassed.
So overall... again, B basically.
As far as commonly used tropes in Star Trek go, this one is actually one of my favorite ones. I like it more than “godlike man must be defeated” and probably even more than “computer runs society,” though not as much as “old Earth tech becomes sentient.” But generally speaking “aliens transcend corporeal bodies by becoming too smart” is a good trope and I like seeing the different spins on it: the Organians, who can choose corporeal bodies if they want and are incredibly peaceful; the aliens from Return to Tomorrow, who wish they still had bodies; the aliens from The Cage/The Menagerie, who do have bodies but can’t do much with them, who must rely on aliens they capture to do physical work on the planet’s surface for them; and these aliens, who are so bored they must rely on arbitrary wagers using enslaved aliens just to have something to do. There’s something sort of... sad but fitting about that fate. Understandable, awful, pathetic. Still, I wouldn’t call this my favorite take on the trope.
But the specifics of the story, outside the “brain-aliens trope,” I didn’t like so much. The BDSM kink stuff mixed in with like actual slavery made me super uncomfortable. I know it’s based on Ancient Rome but like... even though it was a clear bread and circuses situation, that was not what I was thinking of tbqh.
This is a good episode for showcasing Star Trek Values, which overall I would say are my values. I do see how some people today would criticize them for being a little... well. How to say it. Colonizer-savior. I completely disagree that this is the reading that should be given to them and in fact I think it’s a bad faith reading but people are the way they are and certain things are in vogue sometimes and not others, so. I just mean that when Kirk says that they (the Federation, one would assume) have helped other civilizations “progress” or whatever word he uses, it sounds a little like they came in and made alien societies better using their own values. But I would say that what we actually see, in specific examples throughout the series, is the Federation wanting the civilizations it interacts with to be free, in fact requiring members state to be free, and that is really the one value a free society can impose on others or require of others--choosing slavery or dominion is choosing to relinquish all future choices, and thus cannot be allowed by any society that values freedom. That catch-22 that we see so much now. So, my point is, I think the values Kirk epitomizes for the show are freedom, self-determination, and a certain conception of progress, too: the ability to grow and develop, the avoidance of stagnation. And certainly this episode shows a clear case: having everything provided for you in exchange for being the professional playthings of a bunch of disembodied brains is objectively bad! Surely we can all agree on that. But this obvious example is used as an excuse for Kirk to speechify on the topic of what a utopian future will look like, what the best of humans can be, and what the rest of the universe could be like if it learns from our best traits (and not our worst). Which is overall something I find very comforting.
I’d just been thinking, at the beginning of this episode, that I think S1 is a better Kirk season than S2. S2 has too many episodes that problematize his leadership or his heroism, or that barely even use him--even episodes like The Trouble With Tribbles that outright mischaracterize him imo. But this episode really was Classic Kirk and I appreciated that. We see him being charming, smart, selfless, strong, creative, romantic... coming in at the end to embody the utopian values of the series.
Spock was so well characterized and so smart and so heroic, too, that he kinda was the mvp for me, though... Don’t take away my Kirk stan card lol. Spock was just so In Command... You can see how he could become a captain later, even if being in command never really interested him much.
I don’t entirely get why Kirk bargained for the thralls to all stay and make their own government (or to be trained in self-governance by their enslavers... a whole different issue tbqh), given that it’s already been established that most/all of them have been kidnapped from other planets. Should they not be... returned?
And if most/all of them are 2nd or later generations, that’s a whole other complex issue that could perhaps use third party mediators or something...
I also wondered about Shahna's origins. Was she the descendant of another civilization that is native to the planet, or is it just that her people were kidnapped so much earlier that she herself, personally, has never lived anywhere else?
I think it both makes more sense and is a more fitting ending if it’s the first. It makes sense to me that the first peoples enslaved by the brains were natives of the planet: more convenient that way. Also, I think we need to see more alien planets with more than one humanoid or human-intelligence level species.
And, if her people are native to the planet, having them become leaders of their own right again and not just possessions of the glowing brains is more powerful. Otherwise it's kinda sad: yes, they can form their own government here, but they've still been robbed of their real history and their real homeland, which they don't even remember.
Also as my mom pointed out, it’s not clear the brains themselves are native to the planet. They could have been invaders--the last real thing they did before they started wagering fake money--and Shauhna’s people the natives.
I really did like Shahna a lot and I hope she becomes the leader of whatever government they set up and eventually does get to travel into space.
Imo this was one of those TOS eps where the potential back story and the hints of world building are more interesting than the actual story.
Also apparently the actor who played Galt was trying to walk in a gliding manner so it wouldn’t be clear what he was hiding under those robes and... I have to say, definitely wheels.
Next up is A Piece of the Action, one of my favorites. Great plot, great fun, great sci fi concept, great Kirk material!
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Random Thoughts on 6 Months of Obsessing on CSI's GSR
I’ve suddenly come to the realization that it’s now been more than 6 months since I happened upon my CSI/GSR obsession, so I thought it might be time to do a little analysis (and self-analysis) of the exact why this quirky love story grabbed hold of me and hasn’t quite let go.
I think the thing that stands out to me more than almost anything about it is that it is honest. Now exactly what do I mean by that? Leaving out the IMO preposterous divorce, the problems faced by these two characters either in getting together or sustaining their relationship are purely internal: derived from their own characters and not from circumstances contrived to separate them.
I suppose that brings up the most important aspect to this whole thing: these are flawed characters, but that also makes them very human ones--and makes both the love they feel for one another and the permutations they go through because of that love more compelling and believable. That's what gives their whole story a kind of integrity. They're not perfect plastic people; they're not interchangeable with any other couple who has ever inhabited the small screen. Neither one of them ever becomes someone they cannot be. They are who they are.
Curiously, I was watching one of the innumerable manifestations of Star Trek for a short time the other night, and it occurred to me that if GSR were tossed into the ST universe that he would probably be a Vulcan and she an Empath. Rather than “logic,” it is science on which he bases his existence, and she feels too deeply for the victims, at times almost to the point of incapacitating empathy.
The main theme of the GSR love story is Grissom finding his humanity through his love for Sara. What makes it realistic is that it doesn't happen overnight; hell it's at least 4 and a half years of show time before they become a couple, depending on when each individual viewer decides they got together. (I'm assuming no one dates their physical relationship before Nesting Dolls.) Between ND and One To Go, Grissom goes from a man who barely allows himself to feel anything to one whose life decisions are driven by his love for Sara. How much she affects his life choices is done incrementally, so it's not as if the man falls in love and changes overnight. We learn that, in fact, he fell in love with her "at first sight," yet it takes him years to recognize, to give into and, finally, to place his love for her above everything else.
(While I have a great fondness for the Finale, the fact that it was needed to "fix" GSR is absurd. They never should have needed fixing in the first place. I have so many problems with the divorce that I could write pages of rants about it. Well, I have, but I won't include them here. The divorce can be rationalized, and @addictedtostorytelling has done as plausible a job as possible, but, still, in fiction, if a plot point or character action has to be rationalized, that fiction has a credibility issue.)
There tend to be 2 types of love stories: redemption and salvation. GSR is unusual in that there is no redemption needed; these two characters, for all of their eccentricities and emotional disconnections, are actually of exceptional moral character. Instead, it is more a tale of mutual salvation, as each ultimately manages to save the other from a life of loneliness and despair. More even than that it has always struck me as being about 2 people who complete each other. Accident or not, the crossword puzzle metaphor is there in the background from beginning to end: they fill in each other's blanks. And, finally, the genuine sweetness about it is that they make each other happy, not a small thing in the lives of these two for whom happiness is a near alien concept. A lot of fiction pays lip service to the fact that 2 characters need each other; these 2 really do.
Everyone sees things differently, but one of the reasons I find them enchanting is that, as a couple, they have almost a preternatural innocence about them. A lot of that is driven by the fact that it's clear these 2 adult characters have never loved anyone else (or are incapable of loving anyone else), nor been loved. On one level they're like a couple of kids in love for the first time, learning how to "be in love" together; on the other there are aspects of their relationship, especially the emotional trust between them, that are refreshingly mature. They never play vindictive "love games" of any kind. There is jealousy in both of them, but that jealousy comes more from senses of inadequacy in each of them rather than from possessiveness. They are lovers and best friends. While we are given more overt evidence that she confides in him, we are also given hints here and there that she is the only one he can willingly bare his soul to.
It is somewhat anomalous that a show that never shied away from depicting the nuts and bolts of sexual deviance in its crime scenes was downright prudish when it came to its one great love story. At times one wonders if the writers were incapable of depicting normal, loving sexuality: that were we given "details" that it might slip into the realm of the prurient, so they exercised excessive restraint. For such a "cutting-edge" show to operate as if the 1960s CBS censors were looming over GSR is curious. But, then, GSR as a love story is more about their emotional connection than their physical one, and it is certainly made clear, in an almost 1940s movie kind of way, that while sex is not the only element in their relationship that it is not in any way an insignificant or problematic one. Yes, even in the 21st century, it is possible to present a relationship that evinces sexual tenderness without ever once depicting actual sex.
I've very much oversimplified the love story here. I think as a Romance that it was a magnificent achievement--near epic in its scope--especially for prime time TV. It probably demands volumes: it contains metaphysical and existential complexities on the nature of love and the self in love. It's not only a beautiful love story but a very human one.
I am probably not done exploring it yet.
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First Christmas Together | Star Trek One-Shot | Spock x Female OC |
Laarth sets up Spock's first Christmas...and invites their family...and the crew.
Please Enjoy this self-indulgent Christmas One-Shot I wrote. I really missed my partner so I apparently got possessed and wrote nearly 4.5k words. :) But it is done now so Nikkz is FREEEEEEE.
The man’s face scrunched as he heard scrambling around him. He took in a deep breath before sitting up to look at his partner who had already scrambled off somewhere else in one of the other parts of their home. He felt lucky to have time off from the Enterprise to spend it with his excitable love. He carefully removed himself from their shared bed to try and find where his little other half ran off. His eyebrows raised as he finally noticed glittering decorations and tinsel hanging from their walls.
“Laarth,” He called out in his deep smooth voice. He heard the movement stop. His shoulders adjusted for himself to stand straighter. He understood that she was very aroused by the idea of celebrating this holiday with him. It was apparently one of her father’s favorite human traditions. He, himself, didn’t dislike it. In fact, he would have loved if his own mother had shown him the same holiday. When he continued to hear no movement, his voice bellowed through the halls worried, “Laarth?” His panic starting to make him alter himself into a stance where he could rush to her side.
Just as quickly as his worry started to hit him, the small half-Vulcan rounded the corner with a wide smile. The taller man recalibrated himself straighter. His head tilted. Laarth smiled and tossed some clear, white, and blue flecks up between them to have it land into their dark hair. “Good morning,” She smirked. Her face wrinkled in her enjoyment. Laarth was so proud of herself for her hard work. When she looked up at her half-human companion, she could see him looking down at her. His words harsh, but his eyes gentle.
“I said I would enjoy spending the tradition with you. Not that you could allow a hostile takeover of our home,” Spock scolded. He carefully started to pick the plastic out of his Laarth’s hair.
Laarth laughed at him, “But, it is not!” Her sparkling smile melted his heart every time. She laced his long slender fingers with her tiny fingers. She pleaded with him, “Can I show you into the kitchen?”
Spock had to fight his inner laughter at his darling. He nodded and said, “Only if you promise it is not as over the top as the rest of our living spaces that I have seen.”
Laarth led her tall partner into their living room. She had decorated it in his uniform colors. Luckily blue, gold, and silver still matched the general Christmas spirit she was aiming to achieve. When she turned to look at his expression, Laarth giggled. Spock had closed his eyes. Laarth used his hand to stabilize herself as she stood on her toes to try and give him a chaste kiss. His face was so soft and delicate when he was just resting. She could feel his arm stiffen when she leaned more onto it for help. Spock’s eyes opened. He looked down at her and raised his brow.
He helped her down compassionately. He decided to pat her head instead of giving in to her kiss right then. Spock looked around. He was astonished at how much work she must have put in to have everything. He looked down at his small wife. His memories played the trick of seeing her as when they were both much younger. She hadn’t changed much since then, had she? Her look of wonder and admiration towards him still persisted despite all that was thrown at her. He allowed her to interlace their fingers once more. Her soft musical voice snapped him back from his thoughts.
“Do you like it,” She asked. Laarth started to worry. She could tell he was deep in thought, yet she did not want to violate his privacy by invoking their shared mental connection. She removed one of her hands to softheartedly touch his face. His head slowly moved to rest more against her palm. He was like a cat who wanted nothing more than to feel the closeness of another touch.
He stated simply, “I can tell how much effort you must have put into this. Your own emotional state has left an impression upon my own.” He held onto her wrist to keep her hand where it was resting. The feeling of her thumb petting his face he could only define as, what their human ancestry would call, heavenly. He warily let her hand down and asked, “Is this all there is to this...holiday?” He looked around their dwelling once more. He could see a number of wrapped presents beneath a decorated tree. All the dressed parcels seemed to be labeled and wrapped in the colors that matched the rest of the decorum. Blue parcels with golden ribbons, Silver ones with blue ribbons, Golden boxes wrapped with a silver ribbon. They all sat organized into piles.
Laarth shook her head, “There is plenty more.” She followed his gaze and gasped, “Oh yes! The present exchange. That’s later tonight. Around dinner actually. But first, I have more holiday tradition stuff to show you so that you don’t stumble over yourself tonight.”
Spock raised his brow and nodded. He took in a deep breath before letting out another sigh to follow Laarth. He stated, “I would not ‘stumble over myself.’ I have never done such a thing. Also, are you implying that there will be more than just the two of us at dinner tonight?” He followed close behind her. Her short legs were very ineffective at gaining large distances from him.
Laarth stopped in her tracks. She quickly turned on the balls of her feet to look at him. “Yes,” she squeaked out. She looked up at him with a look that was to try and mimic a guilty dog caught doing what it was not supposed to be doing. “Do you mind,” she asked.
“It would be far too late for me to protest,” Spock settled, “May I have an idea of who you invited?” He watched as she rocked from side to side, uncomfortable.
She swallowed her pride and nervously explained, “Well, Vus and my father of course.”
He nodded, “Of course.”
“I also invited your mother and father,” She went on to list.
Spock rubbed his chin, “Understandable. Wouldn’t want them to feel excluded.”
Laarth swallowed hard again and rushed through the last few names, “And I also invited: James Kirk, Leonard McCoy, Montgomery Scott, Nyota Uhura, Hikaru Sulu, Pavel Chekov, and Christine Chapel.”
He sighed and concluded, “Naming them quickly does not impede my ability to recognize my fellow crewmen’s names. Even if you include their first names.” He patted his wife’s head once more. “So let’s hear more about what is customary for your household so that I do not have to hear any unnecessary snark from Doctor McCoy.”
Laarth smiled and sat on their countertop, “Well first, you should be aware of the mistletoe around the house. Mistletoe looks like…”
“I am well aware of what mistletoe looks like,” Spock interrupted.
She nodded, “Well I guess you are also ‘well aware’ of the tradition behind it.” She sneered at him. Her husband rolled his eyes and motioned for her to continue. “Well, it is so that people have an excuse to give their loved ones a kiss.” She started to point out the locations of them in the house. “I scattered them around so if you want to avoid them, you know where they are.”
He nodded, “Thank you. This is very...useful information.” He started to look around the room and locate for himself where the Earth plant branch hung. “I will start making a necessary plan to avoid them. I do find it fascinating that humans went to such lengths to conduct in an activity that they often engage in any way.”
Laarth shrugged and said, “Well, they do not have the blessings that we have. Unlike us, they cannot simply understand each other’s thoughts due to a bond.”
“They certainly are lucky,” He teased.
The lessons went by quickly and Laarth was even able to convince Spock to put on a ‘traditional ugly sweater’ for their dinner party. It didn’t take much from her to convince him. He often gave into Laarth’s requests no matter the logical fallacy at the present time because it often came back around to be quite logically sound when it came to humans. This time, he was just worried about how hot they may feel throughout the night. Vulcan wasn’t the most hospitable place for those who had not grown up within its environment. She seemed perfectly happy though. She was nearly bouncing near the door waiting for people to arrive. Spock pat her head to keep her calm.
First to arrive was her once dark-haired father accompanied by her brother, Vus. Vus exchanged the Vulcan Salute with his brother-in-law and received a massive hug from his sister. Nathan laughed at his daughter and her brother. His full Vulcan adoptive son towered over the half-sister. Nathan hugged both his son in law and his daughter. He could tell Spock was still not quite used to his way of showing affection, but he appreciated the effort from Spock to put up with it. The human man turned to see Vus fussing at Laarth about her glasses. He took them off of her, cleaned them, and readjusted them to her face. Nathan guessed Vus still hadn’t gotten over the time period in which Laarth had become so overcome by grief, she refused to take care of herself.
Next, Amanda and Sarek arrived. Spock assumed that they simply waited in watch to make sure they were not the first to arrive. His mother certainly was the one to come up with that plan. Amanda greeted the two of them much like Laarth’s father. Sarek, however, offered both of them a head bow and Vulcan salute. Spock’s parents walked to talk with Laarth’s family. Amanda was excited to catch up with Nathan and Vus. Sarek and Amanda, Spock concluded, probably had enough talking to his wife due to her closeness of location and career path. They were some of the only people other than federation stationed humans that enjoyed her emotive presence at their home.
Spock let out a sigh as he knew exactly what was to happen next. He wasn’t exactly pleased with the idea that Laarth invited his captain and fellow members of the Enterprise. He knew this could only lead to trouble and pestering about his past.
Captain Kirk paused the rest of the crew before entering. He looked at them and said, “Now, please understand everyone, Laarth most likely went behind our Mr. Spock’s back to invite us here.”
“Well yes, Jim,” Bones laughed, “Do you really think that Mr. Spock would celebrate this holiday, much less invite us to join him?”
Scotty also laughed. “Aye, Cap’n, we realized just that.”
Already sweating, Chekov panted. He started to fan himself, “Can we please go inside? It’s hot out here.”
Uhura nodded in agreement, “Yes Captain. I agree.”
Jim nodded, “I can agree. Let’s go in.” He knocked at the door to be greeted by his first officer. He smiled seeing Spock. He could tell that the Vulcan was amused to see them all gathered here.
Laarth tried to squeeze past her husband. Her head appeared from beneath his arm. She first looked up at Spock then turned her head to the snickering group. She smiled widely, “Oh hello~!” She pushed her wide framed glasses up to be able to see them all better.
Kirk laughed a bit at the sudden emergence of a small feminine head from behind the doorway. He could tell that she was much shorter than his first officer. She also had a much different disposition. “And you must be Mrs. Spock that we have all heard so much about,” He smiled down at her.
When Chekov opened his mouth to speak, Scott elbowed him. This didn’t seem to phase Laarth though. She just brushed it off with the wind. “I can say with 100 percent certainty that my husband did not, in fact, speak of me to anyone on the ship,” She explained, “Also, please call me Laarth. Spock is obviously my husband’s name. It is also easier for both of us.”
Spock looked down at Laarth, “Laarth, my dear, could you remove yourself from the area so I may allow our human friends in? Vulcan’s atmosphere…”
Laarth’s eyes widened as she interrupted him, “Right right! Please welcome them in.” She disappeared into the home.
Sulu laughed to Uhura, “She’s a little different than expected.”
“Yes,” Uhura agreed, “But it is absolutely adorable to see.”
Spock opened the door wider and motioned them inside, “Come inside quickly. Laarth has the house set so all of you should acclimate well. She still hasn’t grown to like our home planet.”
The group rushed in. Kirk stayed behind to ask his science officer some questions to clarify. He looked at Spock and quietly asked, “Our home planet? She doesn’t seem...”
He raised his brow for a second before nodding in understanding, “Oh. Yes. Her ancestry is very similar to mine. In the brief moments you saw her, I do not expect you saw her telltale signs, but her mother is from Vulcan.” He motioned to Vus introducing himself to Scotty and Bones, “That is actually her brother. You will come to know him as Vus.” He guided Kirk into the room.
Vus nodded to Scotty and Bones, “I’m afraid to report that I am actually the small woman’s brother. Despite what you humans may think, Spock and I look near nothing alike in terms of our race.”
Bones made a face at him, “In personality, you two are exactly alike.”
Vus raised his brow, “I apologize if I offended you, Dr. McCoy.”
Scotty simply started at Spock’s wife then explained, “She doesn’t look Vulcan though.”
Vus nodded slowly in understanding. “Laarth,” He called to his sister. When she walked up, he moved her overgrown hair away from her ears and removed her glasses revealing the pointedness of the tip of her ears. “You haven’t cut your hair in a while Laarth. Do I need to stop by more often to do it for you,” He scolded his sister.
Laarth whined, “Vus stop.” She blushed. A green hue spreading across the bridge of her nose into her cheeks. She struggled against her brother’s grip.
Scotty blinked, “Wow, she really is Vulcan.” He swatted a bit to try to get a better look at her, “And wow.”
“Fascinating,” Spock’s voice echoed behind them, “I’m not surprised that the two of you would convince Vus to embarrass her in such a way.”
Vus looked at Spock and tilted his head, “Did you notice she is not maintaining her hair length?” He looked down at his sister, “Does the Academy allow you to wear your hair like this?”
Laarth huffed and said, “I grew it out. The Academy doesn’t care what I do. Most of my students study here anyway. I’m a remedial teacher. Not true faculty.” Her brother let go of her arms. She made a face at him.
Bones looked at her and asked, “Have you and your brother always been like this?”
“Since we first met,” Laarth laughed, “He was so small and sweet back then. Now he treats me like I’m an invalid.” She turned to Vus to scold him herself, “Which is no way to treat your older sister.”
Vus raised his brow, “You have forgotten that I was once your caretaker while you were invalid.”
Spock sighed. He shook his head and looked at Bones and Scotty, “Why don’t you two go join the captain? It seems like I will have to talk down these two.”
“And miss this,” Scotty laughed, “I think not.”
Bones nodded with a beaming smile, “I rather enjoy watching these two.”
Spock sighed, “If you two insist.” He turned to the bickering siblings. He pat Laarth’s head, “It’s quite enough of this, don’t you believe so?” He let his hand run down her hair, “We can discuss this at a more appropriate time.”
Laarth immediately stopped bickering with her brother to look up at Spock, “But you like my hair like this.”
Bones nudged Spock, “But you like it.” He chuckled.
Spock stared harshly at Bones before turning to Laarth, “Later.”
Laarth nodded and followed after her husband. She called back to the group, “It was nice meeting you, Mr. Scott and Dr. McCoy.”
Bones, then, turned to Vus and asked, “Is she actually your older sister?”
When trying to follow her husband to speak to Nurse Chapel, Lieutenant Uhura, and Lieutenant Sulu, Laarth got pulled into a conversation with her father, Spock’s parents, and Captain Kirk.
Upon Nathan pulling his daughter into the conversation, Sarek touched his right index and middle fingers to Amanda’s left, “There is no reason for me to be present in this conversation. You three are acting completely emotional about the situation at hand.” He nodded to go speak to his son.
Amanda nodded and turned to her daughter in law, “We were talking about how much longer the mission for the Enterprise will take.” She wrapped her arm around Laarth’s.
Laarth looked amongst the group, “I do not understand why Sarek would leave if this is all the conversation is about nor do I really understand why I must be here for this discussion.”
Nathan smiled, “Well, sweetheart, we were wondering if you and Spock have discussed what your plans were after this mission.”
Laarth blinked and looked even more confused at the group, “I would assume whatever the Federation would need of him, he would do such. I am planning on being here for my own career.” She shook her head, “This still is no explanation for why Sarek would walk away.”
Kirk smiled, “Well, I believe these two were ready for grandchildren.” He chuckled.
“What,” Laarth exclaimed. Her face flushed with green again. The tips of her ears even becoming similar hues.
Spock approached the group and spoke to Laarth directly, “You seem to be having trouble today.” He looked back to the group, “What caused this reaction from her?”
Kirk smiled at Spock. He chuckled, “Well, those two are ready for grandchildren and they were beating around the bush. So I directly told Laarth.”
Spock blinked and nodded. When he opened his mouth to speak, Amanda interrupted, “You know the both of us do not have the life span of you two.”
“I know, Mother,” Spock agreed. He was about to speak again when Nathan interrupted him.
“We were only wanting to understand if that is even in the cards for us,” the man explained.
Spock nodded, “That is understandable, but-”
Kirk couldn’t help speaking up to his entertainment, “But what Spock?”
The Vulcan looked at his captain slightly annoyed before addressing that section of the party, “It is simply too illogical for us to have children right now. Both of us have our careers we need to focus on. A child would only hinder that ability.”
Nathan shook his head, “But Spock, Laarth’s career has plenty of room to allow a child in it right now.”
“Yes,” Spock agreed, “But mine may keep me away from home, which is not preferable when caring for a child. We also would have liked to postpone having the conversation until we can have confirmation that I will be stationed at home or on a base where we can both provide for and raise our children.” He felt a cool touch wrap around his smallest finger.
Wrapping her smallest finger around Spock’s, Laarth hoped would help calm her beloved down from his anger and irritation. She smiled at him and added in, “I think our views have been made very clear now on this issue. If you please, excuse us.” Laarth gave the group a small bow of her head before leading Spock back to the group he originally wanted her to bring her. Sarek dismissed himself to go back to the group with his wife as Spock and Laarth joined the group.
Nurse Chapel welcomed Spock back with a smile and greeted Laarth, “I think we are all just excited to be meeting you and to see more inside Spock’s life.”
“Thank you so much for saying so,” Laarth’s smile grew, “I was also eager to meet all of you. Each of you is held very close in his thoughts.”
Sulu smiled and said, “That is very surprising.”
Laarth tilted her head and looked up at Spock, “You really have tricked them well.” She turned to them and said, “I think both of our inclinations have imprinted on each other. My husband is very compassionate and empathic. I, however, tend to be more emotionally detached out of the two of us.”
“I simply do not believe you,” Uhura shook her head. She looked between the petite wife compared to her tall husband. She wouldn’t call Spock apathetic, but Laarth definitely was not what she pictured as being emotionally detached.
Spock nodded his head once and helped justify the group’s reactions, “I believe they are not used to having someone so emotive and not actually fully feel those emotions for themselves.” He looked at the group, “When we were children, we both agreed to make a permanent bond. Both of us knew we were going to be separated by several planets and solar systems so we thought it was the easiest form of contact. Laarth has always been very capable in the matter of her telepathic abilities. So when she and I were going to engage in a mind-meld with some transference of katra, I recommended what I had learned a mere five years prior. She and I managed to accomplish what most children needed a high priestess. This resulted in Laarth and I often conflating our thoughts especially seeing that we have been mentally bonded and frequent communication for twenty-seven years.”
The rest of the group looked at the two of them surprised. Chekov blinked a little bit before furrowing his brow, “Just how old are you?”
Laarth smiled, “Don’t you know it’s very rude to ask someone their age?”
The party slowly started to wind down. Laarth helped everyone to their seats and smiled. She pressed her fingertips together. The half Vulcan explained, “I wanted to get all of you gifts for helping take care of my Spock or myself.” She moved quickly to each present and gave them to the corresponding person. “I had to get a little bit of information from my husband to get things that you may possibly like. I hope you all enjoy them.”
The crew of the Enterprise looked shocked. None of them were ready for such a surprise. They turned to see everyone else took it in stride and opening their gifts. Chekov opened his first to find Vodka. He smiled and looked at Scotty who had pulled his gift of Scotch out of the box. Christine slowly opened hers which held some Vulcan jewelry. Uhura and Sulu both excitedly open theirs. Uhura let out a squeak when she saw the Vulcan exfoliants. Sulu carefully took the potted Vulcan seedling out of the box and couldn’t wait to get it onto the ship. Leonard and Jim both looked at each other before opening their gifts as well. Jim sat amazed. He stared in disbelief. He could tell that the replica of his ship was handcrafted. He looked up to see Spock looking at his wife with a raised brow. Laarth just shrugged and smiled. The captain, then, turned to watch his friend Bones open his gift. Leonard’s wrapping paper fell to the floor. He stared at a handwritten account and translation of a medical report that the Vulcan’s had in their records. As he flipped through, he could see some of the drawings were also there. It seemed to be in a different penmanship though.
Doctor McCoy looked up and asked Laarth, “Did you do this yourself?”
“Oh, yes. Yours required me to borrow my husband’s skill a bit more than knowledge,” Laarth stated, “I hope you find his diagrams useful.”
McCoy turned to Spock who simply nodded, “Yes Doctor. I hope that you find them useful as well. My wife will be sending me with a copy as well if you were to have any questions. I haven’t had the time to fully study it, but I will keep it with me so that I can try to read it in my downtime.”
McCoy nodded, shocked. He uttered, “Th-thank you so much.” He shook his head, “Wow. Do you think you can get me one of these for all the Vulcan reports?” He laughed at the last part.
Laarth, to his surprise, seemed to be thinking it over. She opened her mouth to speak, but he interrupted her.
“I was joking, please don’t go through all that trouble for me,” he hurried in explaining.
Laarth nodded, “Of course Doctor. I can still translate them and send them to you, electronically.”
McCoy nodded, “I would really like that. Thank you.” He turned to Spock and said, “You picked a really nice one Spock.”
Spock tilted his head a bit, “On the contrary, she continuously picked me. It was illogical for me to believe that someone of her impressive talents would choose to be by my side unless she specified it to be so.”
After the presentation of the gifts, Sarek and Amanda took their leave. Vus and Nathan soon followed. The crew gave a small goodbye to the couple before returning to the ship. Spock sighed and sat on their couch. His long arm stopped Laarth in her tracks. He pulled her onto the sofa with him and said, “I am sure you are as exhausted as I am after all of that. We can finish cleaning in the morning.”
Laarth nodded. She reached around to a small pocket between the wall and the couch. She tucked her hair behind her pointed ear and handed him the present she had hidden from him. “Merry Christmas,” She smiled.
Spock slowly opened the gift. He blinked as he saw some ear warmers and an eye mask. He restrained a laugh. He removed them and softly placed them on the table, “You didn’t have to make these for me.”
Laarth nodded and placed her forehead on his, “But I wanted to.”
Spock ran his fingers through her hair and said, “Well I didn’t want you to feel left out.”
Laarth raised her brow and asked, “What are you talking about?”
He pointed to his other hand right above her head holding one of the mistletoe that she had hung up.
Laarth smiled and slowly kissed him.
Spock reciprocated for a minute before pulling away, “Merry Christmas, Love.”
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Star Trek DS9 Rewatch Log, Stardate 1909.24: Missions Reviewed, “Chimera,” “Badda Bing Badda Boom,” and “Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges.”
Odo and O’Brien are returning from a conference when their Runabout is rammed by a space whale. It suddenly disappears and their ship is infiltrated by a changeling. Initially, they think it might be a Founder, but Odo quickly understands this is a Changeling like him, one of the 100 sent out into the galaxy to explore. This one, called Laas, has found Odo, the only other shapeshifter he has encountered. Laas immediately shows a disdain for “monoforms,” and particularly after linking with Odo feels the two of them should leave to find other Changelings. He cites the fact Odo knows there is a virus killing the Founders, and together with the other 100, they could form a new Great Link. Also, after having linked Laas knows that Odo stays for one reason only: Kira. Odo tries to get Laas to socialize with his friends but it doesn’t go well, with Laas increasingly taunting Odo for bending to the monoforms’ sense of normal rather than being himself.
When Laas is antagonized by two Klingons on the Promenade, the altercation runs deadly with Laas stabbing a Klingon. When Sisko agrees to extradite Laas to the Empire, Odo believes it would not have happened if Laas were not a Changeling. Quark tells Odo that “solids” are programmed on a genetic level to distrust things that are different. When Odo confronts Kira on this, she realizes how torn he is. She released Laas and tells Odo what planet he can go to in order to find him and start their quest to find the other 100. Odo does go, but tells Laas that he—and Quark—are wrong about humanoids, and Kira is the example that proves it, putting Odo’s desires above her own. Odo bids Laas farewell and returns to Kira. She regrets that they cannot link, but Odo becomes a shimmering mist and surrounds her, encompassing her in the most intimate way he can be with a humanoid.
An interesting look at xenophobia, and how it seems to work both ways with the humans (or humanoids) being distrustful, but Laas himself also refusing to consider them as anything more than savage. It’s an important step for the Odo/Kira relationship, but with knowledge of where the show is going, also is setting the stage for Odo’s eventual exit from the Alpha Quadrant, and making Kira who he leaves behind. That’s a few episodes off though, and right now we can wallow in and wrap the warmth that is their love for one another around ourselves like a cozy blanket. (Before it is ripped away from us.) It would be interesting to see what ever became of Laas and if he found others. Laas Is played by JG Hertzler, who usually plays General Martok the Klingon. His performance and the makeup here come together well enough to make you forget it’s the same man. Also, when Laas first appears as a bit of cosmozoa I would describe as a space whale, it seems to me to be very similar to a gormagander which we will see later (earlier?) on “Discovery.” Memory Alpha, the Star Trek wiki, does not make that connection however, so maybe it’s just me.
Vic Fontaine’s casino is in trouble in “Badda Bing Badda Bang.” The program is suddenly taken over by a holographic mobster known as Frankie Eyes. They can’t just restart the program as it will wipe Vic’s memory. Bashir contacts “Felix” who programmed it in the first place and finds out the takeover is a “Jack-in-the-Box”: an effort to keep the game fresh.
To restore the program (and keep Vic safe) Julian and Miles have to find away to get rid of Frankie Eyes that doesn’t get Vic killed. Much of the rest of the staff want to help, owing a debt to Vic in one form or another. Kassidy Yates also argues for Vic being more than a hologram, but Sisko does not want to participate because he feels the inclusivity of the program ignores the true history of the period, and the struggle African-Americans would have existing in 1962 Las Vegas. Kassidy argues that you don’t have to forget your past to enjoy a version that demonstrates how it SHOULD have been, provided you know the truth. Sisko ponders that while the crew come up with a heist plan to take the casino’s money, preventing Frankie Eyes from passing the cut on to his higher benefactors in the mob. The plan is sound except they need one more role in the heist filled. Sisko unexpectedly appears in order to fill it.
They prep, but of course there are snags along the way and the plan has to adapt to other little unexpected moments built into the program. They do manage to pull it off, ruining Frankie Eyes and restoring Vic’s casino. To celebrate, Ben actually joins Vic on stage to sing “The Best is Yet to Come.”
The last fun episode of the show, period, they still manage to get in some interesting commentary. The argument we may have over a film like “The Patriot” that idealizes a character who would most likely have been a slave owner is demonstrated well here, and Sisko, particularly after his experience as Benny Russell in “Far Beyond the Stars” and “Shadows and Symbols” is the right character to point it out. This is in the end a heist episode, completely in the spirit of “Ocean’s 11” and it never falls into the Trek Trope of “Oh no, the holodeck is going to kill us.” They want to help Vic because the change is real for HIS world, in he has, whether sentient or not, helped them all in their own world (Nog in particular who is well used here). Again, there’s a larger issue here whether or not holograms are life forms, but for the most part, this is a chance to catch your breath, because the next one is back to the big questions.
“Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges” begins with the return of Sloan from Section 31. He knows Bashir is going to attend a medical conference on Romulus with Admiral Ross and Senator Cretak (who, despite being a different actress, we last saw having a stand off with Kira over a heavily armed Romulan hospital in the season opener). Sloan wants Bashir to collect information on the health of the head of a Romulan Tal Shiar (their equivalent of Section 31 and the Obsidian Order). Bashir goes on the trip and finds to his surprise that Sloan is himself there.
When Koval of the Tal Shiar hopes Bashir can show him how to introduce the Dominion “Quickening” virus into a population, he tells Sloan they have to stop him. Sloan however just wants a medical diagnosis as it turns out Koval suffers from a rare Romulan disease. Bashir realizes Sloan plans to kill Koval and make it look like his illness, and that Sloan to know about this must have a mole in the Romulan government. He goes to Ross, who plans to act but mysteriously suffers and aneurysm, leaving Julian on his own. He goes to the one person he trusts, Senator Cretak, to get information that could save Koval. Soon after Koval arrests and interrogates Bashir, soon bringing him before the Romulan ruling council, lead by the Praetor himself (last seen as a proconsul WAYYYYYYYY back in the TNG 5thseason episode “Unification” which had Spock trying to repair Vulcan and Romulan relations). Also there is Cretak, who was caught gathering her information. Koval also brings in Sloan, who he reveals to be a simple intelligence officer looking for revenge for Romulans killing his mentor. Section 31 is a fiction. Koval believes however that Cretak is actually conspiring with Starfleet to kill him, and the council decides to strip her of status, and possibly execute her. In her place on the council, they appoint Koval.
They plan to release Bashir, but Sloan is to be kept. He tries to escape, but is disintegrated by Koval. Back on the way home, Bashir is deep in thought, and he goes to confront the recovered Ross. Bashir demands to know where Sloan is, as Bashir has realized that the plot all along was to get Koval, the ACTUAL Section 31 mole onto the council, while sacrificing Ross’ friend Cretak. Bashir has been outmaneuvered by Sloan and Section 31, getting them exactly what they wanted…and Ross must have known. Ross tells Bashir “Inter arma enim silent leges,” a quote from Cicero that means “in war, the law falls silent.” Bashir is appalled, asking if the Federation is to become a new Roman (or perhaps Romulan?) Empire. Ross dismisses him, and sure enough back on DS9 Sloan reappears, thanking for being a good man who could be counted on to do the right thing so Section 31 could exploit it. Bashir considers calling security, but knows it will do no good.
This one is deep, and Section 31 digs its place in Trek history a little deeper. I really liked Megan Cole as Senator Cretak, eating a jumja stick and winning over Kira before proving to be crafty at the beginning of the season, but she was unavailable for this one. Casting Adrianne Barbeau, no stranger to the genre (Escape from New York, Creepshow, Swamp Thing, being married to John Carpenter) is a bit of a delight though, and her Cretak is a bit more sympathetic than Cole’s which fits this story well. Also look for John Fleck as Koval, who among other roles will play the Suliban Silik on “Enterprise.” The episode though is another unflinching look at what even the best of nations may have to do in war, and what our soldiers may lose of our souls and values to protect the souls and values of the people and nation.
NEXT VOYAGE: The epic NINE PART finale of Deep Space Nine begins with Sisko about to marry Kassidy Yates and Worf back in Dominion hands in “Penumbra”!
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Star Trek: Discovery - ‘Battle at the Binary Stars’ Review
By JRS
"I was raised to believe that service was my purpose."
When Commander Michael Burnham is convinced enough in her own rightness to attack Captain Phillippa Georgiou, her mutiny earns her a place in the brig – just as the Klingons attack, endangering all that Burnham holds dear.
One of the hallmarks of good writing is that you put your characters in layers of jeopardy. Everything builds and builds until the character is forced to choose something in a way that reveals the uttermost depth of that character. The dreadful algebra of necessity, Pratchett called it. What do you do when you're in such a terrible situation that no answer is good, that you have to choose something awful? What do you do when you realize this only afterwards? One of the good things about this episode is how it applies this rule well. Burnham and Georgiou are each combating the Dreadful Algebra in the second half of this two-part pilot, starting with Burnham waking up nearly-exposed to vacuum and somehow finding a way to get shot into the working part of a ship in a fantastic sequence which neatly ties into the foreshadowing of the previous episode.
Burnham is a Spock for the modern generation. Human instead of half-Human, but both raised by Vulcans – with Burnham internalizing trauma at a deep level in the course of her life, after a Klingon attack takes away her parents. Confronted with a warlike Klingon, she responded. Did she know the weapon would kill him? Was it an accident? I'm not sure Burnham knows. This episode sketches more in depth the past between Burnham and Georgiou; we learn how Georgiou tried to groom Burnham for the role of Captain and was perhaps blinded by her own affection for her charge. When Georgiou confronts Burnham about her actions, after she escapes from the brig, Burnham can't even tell if the motivation for her act is rooted in logic or emotion. It's kind of a big breakdown from the whole 'I am perfect and judging everyone else' position which Burnham held when she arrived at the ship. Does Sarek getting Burnham to act and try to help Georgiou despite Burnham's internal struggles and despair imply there's a lot more to this character than we see here? I don't know, but the connection between the two was effective.
Georgiou isn't forced to analyze her actions with the same depth as Burnham. She obviously wrestles just as much with notions of right and wrong, with imprisoning Georgiou in the brig. The fact that her ship is attacked – that Burnham is correct in her analysis of Klingon behavior – just makes her even more frustrated because Georgiou's truly trying to uphold the standards of Starfleet and continue to spread the Federation. This means the ends cannot justify the means. Redemption is definitely a part of Georgiou's worldview, however – and when the chips are totally down, Georgiou has no problem with beaming over onto the Klingon ship with Burnham to try and take T'Kuvma alive, and is actually pretty fantastic in all the action scenes, as you might expect from Michelle Yeoh.
I wasn't too enthralled with the Klingons in the last episode, but this episode, I thought they brought them along far more. Last episode they seemed about on par with the worst of TOS: cheesy, shiny monsters, often exaggerating racial stereotypes. They hated a trite phrase, "We come in peace." The subtitles were annoying, especially if you watched with closed captions and a sound effect popped on screen. This episode gave the Klingons a little bit of depth, although the Maniacal Religiousish Leader is almost a Trek stereotype in itself. I loved the scene of their invisible ship slicing through the Admiral's and then flickering back. The rescuing of the dead was fantastic, and so was the death of T'Kuvma, played by Chris Obi. Whom do we seek. Kahless. How do we find him? Together. Give us light to see. Forever. Will he hide from us always? Never. This is a far more complex warrior culture than simply Argh! We shall conquer! Still, we never find out the meaning behind their hate for "We come in peace," and while I could possibly come up with a plotsplainer, it feels wrong to have to do so for the freaking pilot.
Georgiou's death was unexpected and frustrating. I really loved the dynamic between her character and Burnham, and I loved the fact that it was two badass women who jumped into the breach and tried to bring back a giant Klingon. It's clearly going to seriously impact Burnham, though. Who, after the crew escapes in a (very cool) pod scene, winds up standing for trial.
And Burnham pleads guilty to her role in all of it, and now sees herself as the enemy. And is sentenced to imprisonment for life. This final speech was badly captioned on the CBS AllAccess app, which frustrated me for 9.99 a month and at the very final moment of the show.
Commander's Log
I'm not sure about the whole thing with Sarek as a mystical advisory Pokémon. DS9, however, also started out with a lot of mysticism.
The body-bomb sequence was really well developed and kind of set Georgiou for me in a Picard-level Starship Captain place. Cool, inventive, caring almost to a fault...
The preview for the next episode isn't captioned, but shows Burnham being shipped to prison and experiencing a lot of weird stuff – and the return of the Klingons. Judging by this, Burnham is going to become an action hero.
I really want to learn more about all of the crew. Some of them don't get named in this episode, which is sad, but they all seemed earnest and interesting. From the preview, Doug Jones will be back as Lt. Saru.
This Trek had a very strong, diverse vibe. Both Captain and Commander were non-white women, who, yay, spoke to each other often about things that were not men. This is causing crankiness on the internet. This alone makes me want to give the show more of a chance.
I know the technology has changed or upgraded or whatever, but isn't this a new timeline or something with JJ Abrams? Regardless, I feel this is a meh point for me. We're in 2017 and we can envision basic technology that people wouldn't have come up with during TOS. Plus, based on my Understanding of Humanity, I could easily see an episode where they give up the holographic technology because it's bad for you and radiation or something, so they have to go back and develop special rooms, or whatever. Connect it intelligently enough and it looks like scifi.
The captions were a big problem for many Deaf and hard of hearing people online. Look, if you want to build an audience, you can't get people to risk ten bucks then slap them in the face. The AllAccess app is the biggest obstacle to my liking this show at the moment, that and the knowledge that it's included with Netflix in Every. Other. Country. In. The. World.
Overheard by the Universal Translator
Sarek: Behave.
Sarek: No matter your shame, gather your strength. Find a way to help those who need you.
T'Kuvma: There is no honor without unity. There is no home for any of us, unless it is shared by all. [Sidenote: This quote makes me feel it's possible there might be Deaf people in Klingon worlds.]
Overall
Much more love from me than I felt at the end of the first episode.
The second episode has me hooked, as long as they can keep the writers away from the Hokey Hooch they were clearly drinking when they wrote the Klingons during the previous episode.
The best parts of this episode were Burnham and Georgiou, for me; my question is, now that half the team is killed off, how can the show continue its momentum? I was going to go with four, but the captioning issues made me go with... three out of five body-bombs.
#Star Trek#Star Trek Discovery#Michael Burnham#Saru#Philippa Georgiou#DIS#Disco#ST:Disc#Star Trek Reviews#Doux Reviews#TV Reviews
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i was at northeast trek con this weekend, if you couldn’t deduce it from my posts that must have sounded like they were coming from some sort of hallucinatory trip. to say i had fun would be a wild understatement. if you slot this con on an alignment chart, it would be wall-to-wall chaotic good. the theme advertised was celebrating the 25th anniversary of ds9... and boy did we celebrate.
what follows is everything i feverishly tweeted about the wildest 72 hours of my life.
the only reason i went to this con at all was @thylekshran, who wanted to see one mr. jeffwey combs very badly. @jadziadax happened to say to me one night, “hey you should go to this con happening where you live to see nicole,” and i said, “wait a minute, isn’t this the con dylan wants to go to? what if i actually Did go to this?”
friday: i grabbed dylan, somehow, from the bus stop that i think didn’t quite exist on this plane. we get to the con and we walk into the exhibit hall. nicole is right by the door and i cannot look at her, so we beeline for vendor tables, and suddenly before me is an extremely familiar spread of colorful images. it takes me a minute to process it, and then i’m pointing to this table and rushing toward it going, “OH MY GOD. IT’S HER! FROM TUMBLR! OH MY GOD WHAT.” it was none other than @abravenoise selling prints!!!! i had no idea she would be there since i didn’t look at anything before i left the house. just fyi she is irl just about the nicest person i’ve ever met!!!!!! and i’m so glad we got to hang out as much as we did!
we spent the day mostly going to panels and being big baby chickens regarding jeff’s and nicole’s tables, respectively. we did end up at jg hertzler’s table A Lot, because dylan, like, is recognized?? by him and his wife??? idk dylan’s just out here charming the pants off everybody, so i was like, okay cool, this is the first thing that is Totally Fine, just chilling with martok. we also met two cool dudes through jg who really enjoyed hanging out with us, and that was great! making friends all over the place! not the first and not the last!
one thing dylan and i were bummed about was that the klingon meet & greet party that night (where jg and robert o’reilly would get in costume as martok and gowron and duel to the death) was sold out. we really really really wanted to go... so dylan just... straight up asks jg if he can get us in dhfklshdfd. and you know what? he fucking does. just... put our names right on that list! O K A Y!
the friday panels were a sign of what would be to come, every one we went to was crazy. this was my first real trek con, so of course i have never seen hertzler and o’reilly in a room together, but now i have and my third eye is open and all that. not to mention: learning that garrett wang plays pokemon go, nicole cracking up at poop jokes like i said, hertzler doodling a little shran with glasses on jeff’s sign, the con’s power point file just being named DRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. everything that was happening was so good.
chase masterson had a panel about her pop culture hero coalition, and currently working for a non-profit myself, i was really curious about what kinds of programming they do, so i went to her table to talk to her about it. chase ended up talking some about the why’s of starting the coalition, what it meant to her, her own struggles with depression, and i’m thinking to myself, “uhhhhhh well if chase is gonna share about her mental health struggles, then... i... will also do this.” the nanosecond i said something about experiencing difficulty with self-love, she was zeroed in on me like a cruise missile. i spilled everything to her about my job and how my old boss was basically the meanest, most miserable person alive, and how much she got into my head and how now that i was out of that department, i had to pick up the pieces and it was proving to be much harder than it has been in the past. well, god almighty, chase just had the nicest things to say in return, and we commiserated over being your own worst critic, and how ridiculously hard it is to have this fight against yourself over and over again, but that we deserve so much and going forward is worth it. jesus christ! i got a big hug and said to myself, “holy shit i can’t wait to tell my therapist that a star trek actor talked to me about mindfulness and now i want to learn the hell out of it.”
oh but then it was time for the klingon party that we were now going to thanks to jg hertzler. this thing was off the chain immediately, martok and gowron had their duel, first with sparkling bat’leths that fell apart, and then with whole baguettes, and i can’t believe i got to watch this with my eye parts. and that was the beginning; the party would go for another 3 hours, almost all of which i spent dancing with the most generous people i’ve ever met, who went out of their way to welcome everyone they could onto the dance floor, regardless of physical ability or skill level. there was one woman in particular who, if she saw even the slightest twinkle in your eye and you weren’t already dancing with her, she’d be like, “you, get over here!” i don’t know how my body did that for all that time without falling apart.
our esteemed guests began showing up, and garrett wang leapt into the middle of our jump around circle and gave each one of us a vulcan high five. jeffrey combs showed up which of course sent dylan over the moon, and he said, “you go, girl!” to her dancing. max grodenchik gave dylan one of his drink tickets and then asked us whether or not we thought the existence of god could be proven. chase found us and reached out her hand over a couple people’s heads to give me a supportive hand squeeze (!!!???). aron eisenberg, i don’t know what the hell he was doing, but i feel like maybe somebody asked him about terry, because all of a sudden i hear something like, “terry left because she was in love with nog and couldn’t take it anymore.” garrett has three pokemon go accounts, which he showed off at my urging, and let me tell you, don’t encounter him at a gym because he has three dragonites, two tyranitars, a monster blissey, and god knows what else. dancing, dancing, more dancing. then it was time for it to be done, and time to go home. we watched reanimator. i was wired as hell and barely slept.
and THAT. was only friday.
saturday: i had kept my eyes open for a copy of the lives of dax the day before, but didn’t see anybody selling one. this morning, i walk by a booth we went to the previous day and all of sudden, on top of a bunch of other books in a big tub, there it was!!! couldn’t have forked my money over faster if i tried.
then i had this bright idea. hey... here’s a copy of lives of dax... and nicole is here... and she should sign it... and then in the future i can get terry to sign it... boom, bang, let’s do it, right? i had dylan drag me to nicole’s table because i was like, “i am never going to make even eye contact with her if you do not physically take me there,” and one of us brought up that we missed her at the klingon party. it’s cool, we all gotta sleep, right? well, it turns out nicole had gone out with the gaaays in spaaace people to the bar where they were going to have their party later. so she says garrett texts her, “uhhh hey you know you’re kinda supposed to be making an appearance at this thing, right?” nope! no clue. so she texts him back, “hmmm uhhh well,” takes another sip of her drink, “i think i’m doing good work here.”
the thing about nicole that i somehow missed in my drinking in of all ds9 actor content is that she embodies pure shitposter energy, but if the shitposts were coming from a wine mom. she’s hysterical, 50% intentionally and 50% unintentionally. an extremely excellent human. she signed lives of dax, i had my tribble photo op with her later (that i almost missed due to getting into a conversation with larry nemecek!) and she said she was going to the gays in space party later. helllll yes. i hope somebody puts up her q&a because she told a RIDICULOUS story about auditioning for ezri and creeping on jeri ryan on a plane. i can’t do it justice, there are movements that have to be seen.
we went to combsland finally, and i grilled him about whether or not herbert killed the cat, and we learned jeff has two cats! show them off, man! where are the vids! then, and i had never planned to do this, i bought an autograph from him, and the shran i bought it on ended up selling out! crazy.
hertzler had doodled a martok above his table, and so this combined with the little shran from yesterday led me to these words coming out of my mouth: “can i pay you for a drawing? can i pay you for a drawing of jadzia and martok brofisting?” he gave it very serious thought, said he was gonna have to look at a lot of pictures of terry (relatable), and told me to give him my e-mail. between him and his wife, i hope to god one of them remembers my e-mail is in his wallet. let me give you money!!!
my next tweets jump right to gays in space - again, dylan knows a lot of the gis folks, so i didn’t feel like i was going into this totally unawares. we’re chilling at the bar, i’m drinking my cranberry juice, and then o’reilly, aron, and nicole arrive, telling everybody that jg’s probably going to be late because a bouncer pushed his wife and he might go to jail. like, kidding, but also... it’s jg hertzler and he could legitimately fuck you up. so he was gonna be late, regardless.
nicole sees dylan and me and comes to say hello (????!!!!!) and somebody ends up saying, “get this lady a drink!” yeah, dylan and i were on that. in fact, i pulled my credit card out like i cared not one bit about identity theft, fico scores, my own personal finances; i would purchase this alcohol in an alley from a guy using a card skimmer. few minutes tick by and then i’ve officially bought a drink for nicole de boer (?????????!!!!!!!!) and i’m giving it to her (????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and we’re clinking our glasses together (?????????????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) i’m clinking glasses with nicole fucking de boer and somehow managing to be normal about it. i’m not altogether convinced i didn’t exit the universe entirely by this point and end up in another one.
the gays in space party was AMAZING, it was just as fun as the klingon party! if you have a chance to go to one, please do, there’s like no way you could ever regret it. you get treated to star trek-themed drag shows, get to mingle, there was a raffle, the people were just as friendly as the previous day, it was so great. we were out very late for my old lady body clock but it was worth every bit of exhaustion we felt the next morning, after the saga of actually getting home past a blocked off road and dylan slicing herself open on the bottom of my passenger seat.
sunday: nicole sees me, mid-yawn, and gives me one of those, “eyyy you and me went through some shit last night huh?” looks and tells me good morning. ( ? ? ? ? ? ! ! ! you know this drill.) combs ended up on the escalator behind us after his panel and i turned around and i said to him, “hey jeff, you got any pictures of your cats with you?” (no, but he has a black cat and a very vocal calico.) i went to chase’s table again and got another hug right out of the gate, we took a pic together, and she told me i was powerful! yo! or rather yooooooooooooooooooo!
the con was winding down at this point, but there was one more thing left: jeopardy. the jeopardy game was done at the first northeast trek con and was so popular they did it again, and i really, really hope someone uploads it to youtube because it is beyond description. first of all, the whole draw were the contestants: you could enter a raffle to end up on either hertzler’s, aron’s, or garrett’s team. the champion from the last game ended up buying half the tickets, so he was on it again, and not on aron’s team, much to aron’s annoyance because god almighty did he want to win. he was about to commit murder in there. someone said nicole was upset that she wasn’t in the game because she really wanted to play, lmfao. so the guys running it were like, “well, go get her, she can be on garrett’s team!” which sent aron into a fucking tailspin. now we got a team with two people on it?! they got nicole and drew the other winners, and the game began.
one of the rules was “this isn’t going to be fair. at all.” actually, it was two of the rules. despite this, you’d have thought aron was bitten by a rabid raccoon. every lost question almost got him flipping the table over. nicole belatedly, i’m talking like 5 minutes into it, realizes she doesn’t understand the rules of jeopardy and can’t figure out why “their” question was answered by someone else. she can’t believe someone knew what voyager’s registry number was. one of the questions was, “a young kid called ensign kim this name instead of ‘ensign’,” and with no hesitation, she answers, “asshole,” and wasn’t even joking, that was her actual guess. R E A L W I N E M O M H O U R S
the winner was hertzler and the previous champ. aron wants to ban the guy from buying tickets ever again. we head to the closing ceremony but it doesn’t happen? lmfao. well, guess the con’s over!
@abravenoise, one of our other con pals, and dylan were all taking the same bus that night, so we all went to grab dinner with two other guys, one who was a con pal and one i hadn’t encountered at all, and halfway through our dinner larry nemecek strolls in and sits down with us. things just keep happening, huh? the guy i hadn’t encountered at all was really impressed with me unhinging my jaw to consume my burger, and halfway through doing this i have to stop because he says, “hey, why the HECK did jadzia die?!” ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh here go hell come. my time to shine.
larry like looooves asking people what brought them to star trek, and this time he was asking us the -whys- of what brings us to star trek. i said the characters, for sure. he asked us about our favorites. i told him mine had changed throughout my life, but that when i was a kid, dr. crusher was my first favorite. he said, “in high school?” i said, “no, i mean, when i was REALLY little. like 4 or 5.” he asked me, “wow, have you ever met gates at a con and told her that?” pfft well, no, but first of all, now you got me wanting that, second of all i said what i really wanted was to swap cat pictures with her.
that was the end. i took everybody to their bus, went home, snuggled up in bed, and just asked myself, “what the fuck happened?” i still don’t know! but it was fun as hell, and amazingly impactful, if i’m being honest with you. i was surrounded by so many people brimming with enthusiasm, so many people who were happy. then there’s me, a curmudgeon who’s done everything in her power to stamp down her happiness all in the name of being ~cool or whatever. and it hasn’t made me very happy. i mean, i am also clinically depressed, there is that. but i’ve stopped sharing the things i enjoy with others, especially in recent years. i’ve closed myself off, mostly out of fear and attempting to survive my old job, but even here, i tend to keep myself at a distance, and i thought it was just because i’ve run the whole gamut of loving something before and just want to hang out with my friends. i think it’s more than that, though. i think it’s more of a defensive posture, and it’s that same posture which is running my life right now. it’s exhausting. this weekend wasn’t exhausting. it was in the sense that the human body needs rest and sleep and food and i wasn’t getting nearly enough of any of it, but emotionally, i was unburdened.
it would be nice to be that way all the time. i don’t know if it’ll be possible to be happy again like the people i met this weekend, but i do know that i want to experience this over and over and over again.
now, next time, maybe @rootmacklin and @jadziadax will be with me and we’ll be showing off our friendship necklaces to a very tall lady. that would be a good step toward unlocking my happiness...
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Episode Reviews - Star Trek: The Next Generation Season 4 (5 of 6)
Ok, loyal readers, here’s another group of episode reviews from season 4 of Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Episode 21: The Drumhead
Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):
When an explosion within the dilithium chamber of the Enterprise's engines appears to be the work of sabotage, Starfleet Command dispatches a retired admiral, Norah Satie, to lead an investigation to uncover the cause. Lt. Worf discovers that J'Dan, a Klingon exchange officer, had been using modified hypospray syringes to encode information into amino acid sequences for secret transport. J'Dan admits his collaboration with the Romulans but attests that he did not sabotage the chamber. Satie and Captain Picard interview crew members who came into contact with J'Dan. Among them are Dr Beverly Crusher and medical technician Simon Tarses, the latter claiming that his only relationship with J'Dan was to administer injections necessary to treat a rare disease. Satie's Betazoid aide senses that Tarses is concealing something. Meanwhile, Lt Commanders La Forge and Data determine that the hatch had failed due to simple fatigue, not sabotage.
Picard considers the matter closed, but Satie pushes to complete her investigation of Tarses under the pretext of proving his innocence. She conducts a second interview with Tarses, held in front of a room full of people. Captain Picard assigns Commander Riker to act as counsel to the crewman. Satie's aide falsely accuses Tarses of using a compound found in Sickbay to sabotage the hatch. He then accuses Tarses of falsifying his academy entrance application and that he is in fact one quarter Romulan, not one quarter Vulcan as he had claimed. Commander Riker quickly whispers to Tarses, who invokes his right to not answer the accusation on the grounds that his answer may incriminate him.
Satie uses this discovery as a pretext to expand her investigations. Picard objects, but Satie reveals that she has been in constant contact with Starfleet Command's Headquarters, that all future hearings will be open, and that Admiral Thomas Henry of Starfleet Security will attend. Picard begins to compare the tribunal to a drumhead, resembling a battle-field court-martial of the 18th and 19th centuries on Earth that became infamous for its numerous miscarriages of justice. Even though he resolves to prevent her from conducting a witch-hunt, he is summoned to be interviewed before the tribunal.
Satie uses the hearing to accuse Picard of numerous transgressions of the Prime Directive and other Starfleet orders, actions which were, in fact, later vetted and approved by Starfleet Command. When Worf stands to defend Picard's actions, Satie turns on him, pointing out Picard's poor judgment in having a Chief of Security who is the son of a traitor. Satie then proceeds to question Picard about his encounter with the Borg and whether he has fully recovered, implying that Picard should have trouble sleeping from the guilt he should feel, because the knowledge of Starfleet obtained by the Borg when Picard was transformed into Locutus had caused the loss of 11,000 lives and the destruction of 39 ships.
Picard recalls a quote from Satie's own father Aaron Satie, whose judgments are required reading at Starfleet Academy: "With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." Satie is enraged at him invoking her father, and launches into a fanatical tirade, condemning Picard as a traitor seeking to undermine the very fabric of the Federation. Satie's fanaticism proves to be her undoing, as a visibly disgusted Admiral Henry, who was previously one of Satie's closest allies at Starfleet command, walks out of the hearing without so much as uttering a word to her, and later calls a halt to any additional investigation.
Worf and Picard reflect on Satie's disgrace. Worf expresses regret for his assistance in her investigation, not seeing her for what she really was. Picard notes that such enemies are well-disguised through apparent good words and deeds, and that vigilance against such subtle threats is the price humanity must continually pay in exchange for freedom.
Review:
It’s a sad truth that this episode will continue to find resonance in any present-day that it is viewed because it all revolves around how easily we can fall victim to witch-hunts and fanaticism. The Salem witch trials, the progression towards Nazi domination of 1930’s Germany, McCarthyism and even the anti-protest bill cooked up by the present Conservative government here in the UK are all examples of how those in power will seek any excuse to scapegoat the innocent in the name of a false righteousness. It is the ultimate form of villainy camouflaged in good deeds, often begin under a seemingly benign excuse and often allowed to carry on for far too long because it doesn’t rear its head suddenly. It is subtle, insidious, and it is why all people all round the world need the ability to hold their leaders to account.
This is why this episode is one of Trek’s finest; it explores an issue that keeps coming back to haunt all societies because too many people forget their own history, and it does it through the metaphor of the Trek reality. Jean Simmons makes for a very effective antagonist as Norah Satie, and at first you do actually like her, only to then begin to see how horrible she is just as Picard does. Michael Dorn and Patrick Stewart also give stand-out performances as Worf and Picard, both of whom are firmly at the centre of this episode. Indeed, the whole thing is well-performed, and the reality that this issue could dog humanity even into the 24th century if one if not vigilant helps to bring the world of Trek down to Earth a bit more. That’s something I always appreciate because all too often there is only so much unrelenting optimism one can stand, and there has to be the occasional flaw here and there to lend the show’s premise some believability. I honestly can’t find any flaws in this episode, and I also like how the episode makes Picard re-examine one of the show’s staples, namely his use of Deanna Troi’s psychic powers. For me, this one warrants the full 10 out of 10.
Episode 22: Half A Life
Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):
The Enterprise takes aboard Deanna Troi's eccentric mother Lwaxana and Dr Timicin of Kaelon II. Timicin is brought aboard to conduct an experiment which he hopes will save his threatened home planet, as its sun is in a state of near-collapse. The Enterprise takes Timicin to a sun in a similar state of decay to conduct experiments which may yield a method for saving the Kaelon system from destruction.
Upon arrival at their destination, the crew assists Timicin in modifying photon torpedoes to launch into the proxy sun with the expectation that it will repair the damaged star and prove that the technique can be safely applied to the Kaelon sun. The torpedoes are fired and, although the experiment seems initially to work, the effect is short-lived and the star explodes. The Enterprise returns to Kaelon II. Timicin is crushed, and after some questioning by Lwaxana, he reveals that there are other things troubling him. Timicin tells Lwaxana that he is about to turn 60, and on Kaelon II, everyone who reaches that age performs the "Resolution", a ritual act of voluntary euthanasia. Lwaxana is outraged to learn of this and brings it to the attention of Captain Picard.
Picard makes it clear to Lwaxana that due to the Prime Directive, he will not interfere in the planet's local affairs. Lwaxana tries to beam herself down to the planet to halt the process herself but she is thwarted by Deanna who comforts her. After Lwaxana and Timicin spend an evening together, he tries to explain the custom of the Resolution. He tells her that it was created to stop age-based poverty and a fixed age had to be selected by the Kaelons because just randomly choosing a time to die would be heartless. Lwaxana finds the practice barbaric and refuses to accept the Kaelon tradition. She tells Timicin how a Betazed woman on her planet successfully fought the tradition of wearing ornate wigs that contained live, captive animals. It only took one courageous woman to step forward and end this cruel tradition. Lwaxana also compares Timicin's plans to end his life with his research to save his star, noting that perhaps it is also time for his star to die as well, so why should he continue to try to prevent it from dying. Timicin thinks about what Lwaxana has told him.
Timicin's analysis of the failed test turns up some promising options, but if he follows through with the Resolution, no one will have his experience and knowledge to carry on his work to save his world. Concerned, Timicin requests asylum on the Enterprise so that he can renounce the Resolution and continue his research. B'Tardat, the Science Minister on Kaelon II, is outraged after learning of Timicin's request for asylum, and he sends up two warships to ensure that the Enterprise does not leave the system with Timicin on board. As Picard orders the bridge crew to analyze the offensive capabilities of the Kaelonian ships, Timicin realizes that his situation is not as simple as he had hoped, for his home planet will not accept any further reports from him, and he realises that even if he does find a solution, they will not accept it.
Dara, Timicin's daughter, beams on board the Enterprise to insist that he return to Kaelon II and undergo the Resolution. She tells him that she cannot bear the thought of him being laid to rest anywhere but next to her mother and, although she loves him, she is ashamed of him. Timicin realizes that he is not the man to forge a cultural revolution, and agrees to return to Kaelon II. Lwaxana, despite her disagreement, realizes that Timicin's decision is his to make. As it is the custom for loved ones to be present at the Resolution, Lwaxana beams down to be with him at his side at the time of his death.
Review:
When you realise this is a Lwaxana Troi episode, the impulse to skip it altogether is very hard to ignore, and it’s certainly got moments early on where you’re getting her usual over-the-top attitude that really isn’t funny and just annoys the hell out of me. However, this is also an episode with David Ogden Stiers, better known to many as Major Charles Winchester of M*A*S*H fame, coming on as a guest character, and having a guest like that on the same episode as Patrick Stewart is always going to be worth a watch, and so the Lwaxana bit is something one attempts to tolerate.
Now, once you get to what the episode is really about, the whole thing takes a great big seismic shift that suddenly opens up Lwaxana to be a decent character to watch; she’s fallen for her fellow guest character Timicin (played by DOS), only to learn his culture practices euthanasia based on a general age, and all of a sudden, her character and her performance are finally, finally something that is actually Trek-worthy. It’s a great bit of issue exploration and a fun change that it’s the two guest characters rather than any of the series main cast holding the focus throughout the episode.
In many ways, I think the approach of the Kaelon II society is probably representing one or both of two things. The first is that the reason for the resolution, the planet’s past issues with age poverty, could be a metaphor for the same issues experienced by many societies in real life. The second, through the concept of the ‘Resolution’ ritual, is a metaphor for how some people may view assisted suicide, in that some may take it as arbitrarily killing anyone over a given age as a preventive measure rather than doing it more on the basis of individual medical necessity.
The episode doesn’t really take an overall side in the overall debate, and the character of Timicin going ahead with his ritual suicide comes strictly from things like the Prime Directive and the in-universe obstacles to him trying to resist the ritual instead of a writer or director trying to suggest it’s right or wrong. This is also a notable episode for briefly featuring actress Michelle Forbes, who would soon become better known to TNG fans as Ensign Ro Laren. Anyway, to sum up, I’d give this episode 8 out of 10; if Lwaxana had been played seriously, or at least a bit more toned down, right from the outset, this could have been a top marks episode.
Episode 23: The Host
Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):
Odan, a mediator, boards the Enterprise to negotiate a peace treaty between two hostile lunar colonies of the same race. Doctor Beverly Crusher is charmed by the man, and the two share a love affair during the trip. Odan refuses to use the transporter and requests that a shuttle and pilot be provided for him; Commander Riker honours this request. During the mission, the shuttle is attacked by a dissident faction and Odan is mortally injured. While trying to save the alien in sickbay, Dr Crusher comes to learn that Odan’s species, the Trill, are a joined life form; a humanoid host and a symbiont that lives within the host, and Odan is actually the symbiont component. It is further revealed by Lt. Commander Data that the transporter would have harmed the symbiotic lifeform. Following the death of Odan's host body, Commander Riker volunteers to allow Odan to use him as a host to conduct the necessary negotiations until a new host arrives.
Odan's presence becomes dominating over Riker, and Dr Crusher finds herself initially confused when Odan continues to try to engage with her to continue their relationship. Dr Crusher is puzzled and full of emotion as she later confides to Counsellor Deanna Troi and wonders about the true depth of her feelings for Odan. With some effort, Odan in Riker's body manages to convince the delegates from the warring moons to work with him and work out an agreement. However, Riker's body begins to deteriorate due to the incompatibility of different physiologies, and the ship transporting the new host has encountered engine malfunctions. Dr Crusher does everything she can to extend Riker's and Odan's chances while the Enterprise races to meet the Trill ship, and has a deeply emotional moment with Captain Picard.
The Enterprise successfully rendezvous in time to bring aboard the new host, a female, much to Dr Crusher's surprise. She helps to transplant Odan into the new host, and both Riker and Odan fully recover. When Odan attempts to continue their relationship, Dr Crusher is uncomfortable, knowing both that the Trill appear to have no preferences on gender orientation, and that Odan will continue to live on in any number of hosts' bodies. Odan admits she still loves Dr Crusher, but understands her confusion and discomfort, and promises to never forget her or their short time together. And Dr Crusher replies that she loves Odan too; in Odan's new, female host body, Odan then kisses the inner wrist of her hand.
Review:
This episode is an ok one, but it gets undone by both later continuity within the Trek franchise and how it ends. First off, this episode introduces us to the Trill, and much like the Cardassians that race gets sizeable improvements through their use in Deep Space Nine, so looking at this episode with the benefit of that hindsight, this is a quite poor, clumsy initial execution. In many ways, this is one of the things that is almost certainly a drawback to serialised story-telling; the rush to make the deadline for the next instalment is probably why the Trill make a poor first appearance and then get improved. Given the proper time, a more effective first-time appearance that could be made consistent into the rest of Trek might have been managed.
Now the crux of this episode is meant to be a metaphor for how our feelings towards others change when they alter significantly on the outside, as a kind of metaphorical exploration of how humans fall in love. It’s certainly apt in that we are indeed a species initially attracted by outside appearance rather than the inner person, and it’s a combination of these two aspects that we fall in love with. Any major change to either massively impacts the sum total, and there’s no guarantee of love surviving that, given that the emotion is paradoxically incredibly strong and incredibly fragile.
Where the episode’s execution lets this premise down is at the end when Odan does a second body-swap, and this time it touches on the concepts of transgenderism and homosexuality by putting Odan into a female body after we’ve had two male bodies. Now at first that seems like it could be a good thing, but then Beverley makes it whiff by not only saying it’s a bridge too far, and then putting that down to being part of being human. First off, she’s been bonking a fucking alien for the better part of a fortnight; you cannot seriously tell me anyone open to inter-species copulation is going to be a bloody homophobe, especially in the era of TNG Trek. At the very least, she could have let him down gently and just said “it’s just my personal preference”, as opposed to getting all uppity about the gender change.
Second, we’re supposed to be beyond homophobia and transphobia by the time of TNG Trek, so the dialogue about it being a ‘human limitation’ is very much anti-Trek. It’s not enough to just add in a little bit saying ‘maybe one day our ability to love won’t be so limited’; that’s for 20th and 21st century humans to say. 24th century humans can’t say that because they’re supposed to be beyond that kind of rigidity and prejudice already. Again, Beverly should have just said “I’m sorry, it’s just my preference to only go for men,” or words to that effect. Overall, I give this episode only 3 out of 10.
Episode 24: The Mind’s Eye
Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):
Chief Engineer Geordi La Forge of the Federation starship Enterprise, en route to the planet Risa for shore leave in a shuttlecraft, is captured by Romulans. While an impostor that looks like La Forge is sent to Risa, the Romulans tap into La Forge's visual cortex via his visor sensors, enabling them to begin mentally conditioning him to act as their agent. After several days, La Forge's mind is wiped of his capture but given memories of going to Risa, and put back aboard his shuttle to return to the Enterprise. He arrives as the Enterprise crew are working with the Klingon Ambassador Kell to deal with rebels attacking the outlying Krios colony of the Klingon Empire. The Governor of the colony, Vagh, asserts that the rebellion is being aided by the Federation, thus requiring the Federation's presence to resolve.
At the colony, Vagh shows Captain Picard and Kell several Federation weapons and medical supplies taken from the rebels. Picard orders his crew to investigate. Lt. Commander Data finds that strange E-band signals are being transmitted from but cannot detect the source. He and La Forge also discover the apparent Federation weapons were replicated using Romulan technology and powered by Romulan energy cells. Later, under the direction of his controllers, La Forge unknowingly transports a case of Federation weapons from the Enterprise to the rebel base, and then subsequently erases the logs. Vagh, monitoring the transport, immediately accuses the Enterprise of its deception. Data and La Forge review the transport logs but find no evidence for the transport even though the weapons originated from the Enterprise, and realize that only they themselves and two other crewmembers could have falsified the logs in that manner. Again, outside of his control, La Forge enters Kell's quarters on the Enterprise, where it is revealed that Kell is controlling La Forge. Kell orders La Forge to assassinate Vagh in a public setting before witnesses in such a manner as to utterly convince Vagh's people of Federation involvement.
At Kell's suggestion, Picard invites Vagh to come aboard the Enterprise to witness the transport logs first-hand. As Picard takes Vagh around the ship, Data comes to learn that the E-band signals are coming from aboard the Enterprise and that La Forge never made it to Risa. He orders Lt Worf to immediately detain La Forge. The assassination attempt is blocked, and Data arrives to explain the situation, saying that the limited transmission range means the device controlling La Forge must either be in Picard's or Kell's possession. Kell refuses to undergo a search, but Vagh offers to take him to the colony to do so there. Fearing the consequences of being investigated by his own people, Kell quickly requests asylum aboard the Enterprise, which Picard says they will consider after his name is cleared of any wrongdoing by the Klingons. Kell is taken away by Vagh's guards. La Forge is cleared but struggles to understand what happened to him.
Review:
As someone who has been researching recreational forms of hypnosis recently for fiction-writing purposes, I now find episodes like this that are all about ‘brainwashing for evil’ a bit irksome. Part of why hypnosis and related subjects get a bad reputation is pop culture where such practices are mis-used by villains. Granted, that’s kind of the point of this episode, as it’s basically TNG doing an homage to The Manchurian Candidate, but personally I wish there were more episodes of TV shows showing such things in a more positive light. After all, it’s not that something like hypnosis is bad in and of itself; it just sometimes gets misused by people with bad intentions.
All that said, it’s an otherwise ok episode that helps to feed into the overall thread of some past episodes to feed into the upcoming season finale cliff-hanger. However, it does fall a bit flat for neither developing a character (aside from the closing scene between Geordi and Deanna, there’s no psychological consequence for Mr La Forge after this that I can recall), nor for exploring an issue. It’s basically an episode that is Trek by name and appearance, but not Trek in substance. Add that to the perpetuating of negative hypnosis myths, albeit through some very heavy metaphor, and I only give this episode 5 out of 10.
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DISCO TALKS
I have lots of feelings this week and I’ve waited a little to try and approach them - but I’m still a big old mess.
Dis long.
So much is happening all the time in this show and I never get around to covering everything I’m thinking and feeling and this will be no different a post.
But what I’m most connecting to at the moment is definitely Ash Tyler as a character and Michael Burnham as a character and actually - it’s everything. I’m connected to everything. I’m wired the fuck in.
But I can’t possibly talk about everything. So lets see what I get around to.
Deep breath
I’m not troubled, exactly, about seeing large chunks of the this show’s audience out right calling for Ash Tyler’s demise.
I expected that - and I’ll get around to that.
Personally I happen to think Ash Tyler’s first PTSD (ish) storyline was a bit sloppy as it was wrapped up in a wacky sci-fi plot which obscured/blurred direct real world correlation with living with PTSD.
But I do think the Voq-and-Ash-consciousness-braino-tango can act as perfectly acceptable, albeit a slightly oblique, metaphor for the most demonizing of mental illnesses.
The show has expressed that the Ash Tyler that killed Dr. Hugh Culber is not considered by the doctors and scientists on board the Discovery as being the Ash Tyler now free to roam the ship.
They’re letting him roam the ship y’all.
That’s simple exposition for: “These Characters Are Being Written to Choose to Understand Ash Tyler as Having Not Consciously Committed Murder”.
We the audience are assumed to follow suit.
And yet…
The calls for pitchforks and all the blunt outright dismissal of Ash Tyler I’ve seen in the past few days reads to me like someone who experienced a deeply traumatic and violent psychotic break or episode and is being punished for it.
Which isn’t exactly fair of me, I know.
There is a responsibility with mental illness and PTSD, there absolutely is. It is up to the individual to do the work they need to do to keep themselves and others safe.
Ash did not do that.
He was written to handle his entire situation very, very poorly.
Ash/Voq tried to kill Michael.
That is what was written and is what transpired between those two characters, intentionally.
But Ash has also been written to get the chance to put in the work to learn, and get better, and to do better.
And I’m not mad at that story.
I don’t think I’ll ever be talked into being mad about it either.
Like, this episode was titled “The War Without, The War Within”.
The violent and entirely least relatable of mental illnesses, those that frighten and consume it’s sufferers, have drastic social complications attached to them and thus there are drastic social complications attached to those that are known to experience them.
There is an interesting (and kinda horrible) mimicry of common social stigma regarding violent psychotic behavior at play in Discovery’s viewership and their reading of Ash Tyler.
I don’t think I’m so far out there in my opinion that Ash’s first arc has actually been about the personally incomprehensible nature of experiencing and handling a budding psychotic disorder (within intensely weird and franchise-specific sci-fi wrappings, of course).
I think, I hope, Ash’s second arc will be about learning to live with who he is in his entirety; that he seeks help for himself and comes to understand what he experienced and how to prepare for living with himself, for himself.
And Michael is dead on: That will always be hard, solitary, work.
I’m also of the opinion Michael has every right to be honest with Ash and do what’s right, and best, for herself.
Shocking, it seems, to hold sympathy and understanding for both of these characters.
Michael is honest but firm and in turn openly offended by Ash, but we see within Michael’s goodbye that she saw the truth in Tilly’s words; how Ash is treated now within his early stages of changed self-understanding will most likely determine what kind of person he ends up being.
Michael knows she is not responsible for Ash, but at the same time humanity cannot be irresponsible within our treatment of each other.
Would Michael yelling and being angry have been justified? Absolutely.
Would such a display of disdain and fear have marked Ash to wander down an at-risk path? Whose to say.
Because that isn’t the scene we were shown.
Micheal is doing the right thing by her to let Ash go and she is doing the right thing by explaining her choice to him.
Again, does she owe Ash an explanation? No.
But she was written to give him one all the same.
I felt that the raw, emotional, and interpersonal context driven conversation between Ash Tyler and Michael Burnham is exactly the kind of Star Trek story I wanted to experience within the adapted serialized format.
This series isn’t wrapping up plot denouement with captain’s logs so the “start” and “stop” of storylines will by nature of the serialized format be a lot more blurry.
We as an audience have to do a lot more work to find themes and to puzzle them together within this particular show in this franchise - but Discovery is certainly trying it’s best to mirror (L O L) events and situations, even down to particular scenes.
We have Michael going to Ash to gain official verbal closure between them because that is the healthier and more responsible story telling choice leading up to that cherished 60s space utopia. I say this every week but this show is about “discovering” how people can be better people. That is it’s long term jam.
UGH I have so much more to saaaaaay about how the show is using Ash and related fuck all but I have GOT to move on, we gotta get to my train wreck Sarek!
Crap Dad is trying his best today. He has even, finally, perhaps, seemed to have given one of his children good advice.
Now, I know Sarek saying not to regret having loved and brigin’ up lovin’ enemies will read to some as him being pro-Ash and like pressuring Michael to rethink dumping him but like sorry, that’s wack, that isn’t what’s happening in this exchange.
Not that I’m saying my interpretation is law but I’m pretty damn sure it ain’t the above either.
Anyways
The first part of Sarek’s Dad Talk is the thorn in some boots; “For what greater source of peace exists than our ability to love our enemy?”
What’s daddy’s angle here?
Why is this nerdo sayin’ this?
Loving your enemy is the kind of thing folks say, and hear, without thinking about it a lot of the time. There is something about the phrase that invokes simultaneous disdain and awe.
But generically speaking an enemy is someone or some group who opposes you or your group’s convictions. Enemies are opponents.
Was Ash ever Michael’s enemy?
Ash attacked Michael during his episode of consciousness-collapse with the intent to kill her - but did Michael then, and does Michael now, think of Ash as her enemy?
Michael doesn’t hesitate in response, she says she has made “foolish choices, emotional choices.” (ie. emotional choices are foolish, I’ve been a big dumb dumb, please reprimand me Vulcan Dad)
What Sarek does in his farewell with Michael is the most supremely Vulcan thing he could have done, but probably not at all in the way Michael expected.
When Michael says she has made foolish and emotional choices Sarek tells her “Well, you are human” which, usually, is the sickest of Vulcan burns.
But!
BUT!
Sarek then places his hand on Michael’s shoulder (wtffff) and tells her “As is your mother” - which is, by his standards, an extremely flashy omission that he consider’s himself Michael’s father and not simply her steward.
Oh boy, remember when Michael flung “father” at him like a weapon for saying they’re not technically related, so logically they’re not father and daughter - do you remember that?!
Well, now Sarek (the disaster that he is) is using logic to label their relationship without having to outright say it.
Honestly, his phrasing here might be the best proof that we’ve ever been given showing that Sarek may actually be the great statesman and representative the franchise has been hyping him up to be for generations.
Michael is in fuckin’ shock here btw, she’s stunned.
The icing on the cake is that Sarek, following up the proclamation that Michael and her mother are both human, goes on to say “There is no telling what any one of us may do where the heart is concerned.”
Now, admittedly, this may be a stretch but it’s uncharacteristic for a Vulcan to lump themselves in with “any one of us” without differentiating the “us”.
Especially when regarding icky emotions.
It sounds like Sarek is lumping himself in with his human wife and daughter as being apart of the “us”, of being/acting human. Of making foolish and emotional choices.
At this point Michael’s eyes have unfocused and I’m fuckin’ crying.
AND THEN Sarek’s tells Michael to not regret loving someone.
Nerds know we can apply this to Sarek’s love for Amanda, the long suffering humans lady dealing with this man’s many child projects™.
But it is also applicable to these two and their interpersonal situation.
By telling Michael not to regret loving someone Sarek is once again affirming something concerning their relationship without having to say it outright: “I do not regret loving you” and/or “I love you.”
AND THEN ALSO Sarek’s statement suggests that Michael’s foolish and emotional choices are not worthy of regret; that emotional choices are not inherently foolish.
And I think “foolish” is the key insight into Michael’s feelings here.
I think Michael feels like a fool about Tyler; about the Binary Stars; about Lorca; about her choice to bring Mirror!Georgiou; Michael feels foolish and maybe even shame for investing in and loving people who have let her down, who she has let down, who used her, and who she knows isn’t who she wants them to be but can’t help but feel moved all the same.
It’s a wider statement as well: Don’t regret love. Don’t regret trying to understand and connect to people. Don’t regret not knowing what you couldn’t have known. Don’t regret being optimistic and in believing people up front.
I can go on, we can all add to this list on what this simple phrase could translate to within the story of Michael and the Discovery so far, out into what we know and want from Star Trek, and then even within our own lives.
Haha, media is wild!
God this is so long.
I’m so sorry.
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Star Trek: Discovery Season 3 Episode 1 Easter Eggs and References
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This Star Trek: Discovery article contains spoilers for the Season 3 premiere.
You’d think that a new Star Trek series set centuries and centuries beyond any of the shows and movies wouldn’t have that many references to the series and films that came before, right? Well, Star Trek: Discovery Season 3 might be set in a brand new time period — the year 3188 to be precise — but the narrative is built atop the layered history of Trek’s future history super carefully. Showrunner Michelle Paradise and Alex Kurtzman have mentioned several times that 930 years from 2257 puts them well past the constraints of canon, and yet, the debut episode of Discovery Season 3, demonstrates a meticulous understanding of where this show came from, and a desire to keep everything about the larger story of Star Trek, as tightly knit as possible.
In other words, there were a lot more Easter eggs and references in the newest Discovery episode than you might think. Here’s every Easter egg and reference we caught in the first episode of Star Trek: Discovery Season 3, “That Hope Is You, Part 1.”
The saucer of a Federation starship
The first thing we see as Book flies his impressive starship in an attempt to outrun Cosmo, is the wrecked saucer section of what looks like a Starfleet ship. The dead giveaway is the letters “NCC.” Was this a Federation ship from the 31st century? The 30th? Even older? We don’t know, and we probably never will. Every wondered what “NCC” stands for? Well, it’s never actually been established in canon, but in the early days of The Original Series it was designed as an homage to American ships having an “NCC” as part of their registry and Russian vessels using “CCC.” Some apocryphal books claim “NCC” stands for “Naval Construction Class” or “Naval Construction Contract Number.” Basically, the idea that Starfleet still views itself as a kind of Navy would support this theory, but since it’s not actually a Navy, that also doesn’t make a lot of sense.
Space-time anomaly detected
Book’s onboard ship computer tells him that a “space-time anomaly” is detected. This anomaly is the wormhole created by Burnham and the time crystals from the Discovery Season 2 finale, “Such Sweet Sorrow Part 2.”
3188
Burnham lands in the year 3188, which is actually one year further than most fans guessed. Discovery jumped from the year 2257, which means we thought 930 years later would be 3187. But, as we learn later, Burnham also didn’t land on the planet Terralysium, even though that was her destination. Terraylsium was first seen in the Discovery Season 2 episode “New Eden.” Book tells Burnham the planet she ended up on is actually called Hima. Terralysium was in the Beta Quadrant. We have no idea where Hima is.
Burnham is happy there is life
You might wondering why Burnham is so happy that the computer says “Multiple life signs detected.” Well, the whole point to jumping in the future was that in all other scenarios, both Spock and Burnham’s mom, Gabrielle Burnham, saw a future in which an A.I. called Control had eradicated all sentient life in the galaxy. Clearly, that didn’t happen. Which means Burnham’s mission was successful. This is why later, she says, “I saved all the things.”
The last Red Signal is for Spock!
As the computer tells Burnham the wormhole is closing, she frantically sends an energy signal through the wormhole. This is the last of the seven red signals from Discovery Season 2. In “Such Sweet Sorrow Part 2,” Spock waited for four months to see the Red Signal, which was a message from Burnham that the crew had made it through the wormhole safely. Basically, this scene happens “at the same time” as the final scene onboard the Enterprise in the Season 2 finale.
“Delta shield”
As Burnham goes through her inventory she mentions her “emergency ration pack,” her “phaser,” and her “Delta shield.” The Delta shield is her Starfleet badge. Fans have referred to this symbol as a “Delta shield” for years, but it’s never been uttered on screen.
New opening credits
The Discovery opening credits have changed again! Here are the most significant changes
The generic male-ish face now appears to be more female.
There is a line of Starfleet robots. Will they have a larger role to play later in the season?
In the first two seasons, the image of the Discovery-era phaser morphed into the TOS-era phaser. But now, it becomes a FUTURE PHASER.
Book’s ship is in the opening credits.
The new “future” Starfleet logo appears twice—nce by itself, and again, in the transporter. In season 2, a Section 31 badge appeared during this segment.
Michael busts out some Suus Mahna
While fighting Book, Burnham seems to employ at least a few moves from the Vulcan martial art known as Suus Mahna. This martial art originates in the prequel series Enterprise, but we first saw Burnham do it in “Context Is For Kings” in Season 1 of Discovery. We also saw two Synths practice Suus Mahna in the Star Trek: Picard Season 1, episode 9, “Et Arcadia Ego Part 1.”
The nearest natural wormhole could be a DS9 reference
Book mentions that “the nearest natural wormhole is 100 lightyears from here.” This could reference the Bajorian wormhole from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. After all, there aren’t that many stable wormholes. That said, technically, the Bajorian wormhole isn’t “natural” since it was constructed by the Prophets, but from Book’s point of view, that might not matter.
The Gorn destroyed subspace
Book says: “Wasn’t bad enough for you that the Gorn destroyed two lightyears of subspace?” This references two things at the same time. First, obviously, the Gorn, the lizard-race first seen in the Star Trek: The Original Series episode “Arena,” and subsequently referenced in nearly every new Trek series, including several references in Star Trek: Picard. But, the mention of the Gorn having destroyed subspace means that parts of the interstellar communication network have been obliterated. Subspace is how people get messages around the galaxy in Star Trek. If parts of subspace are destroyed, this could explain why, the Federation representative, Aditya Sahil (Adil Hussian) mentions that long-range sensors “failed, years ago.”
Book references Scotty….and Tilly’s other best friend
When Book says he wants to “whip-up a dilithium recrystalizier,” he’s referencing the idea of dilithium crystals being reconstructed artificially. In Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, Scotty does this to help get a stolen Klingon Bird-of-Prey home. And, in the Short Treks episode “Runaway,” Tilly meets Po, the Queen of Xahea, who also invents this technology.
Benemite and Quantum Slipstream Drive
Book also wonders if there is some “Benemite lying around.” This references the Voyager episode “Timeless,” in which the crew tried to build a Quantum Slipstream Drive. Basically, if Book had a Quantum Slipstream Drive, he could get around a lot faster.
Tachyon Solar Sails
Book says “tachyon solar sails are slow as shit.” This references the DS9 episode “Explorers,” which sees Ben Sisko building an ancient ship that runs on tachyons solar sails.
Don’t Even Get Me Started On Trilithium
Book completes his rant on different types of Star Trek propulsion and fuel by saying “don’t even get me started on trilithium.” This seems to be kind of a joke. In the TNG episode “Starship Mine,” Trilithium resin was kind of a waste byproduct of the warp engines that could be stolen and turned into a weapon. But in the film Generations, trilithium was something described as a “nuclear inhibitor,” meaning it could make stars implode. So, which is it? Both? Also a form of fuel for space propulsion? Don’t get Book started.
Orions and Andorians
Burnham is shocked that the Orions and the Andorians are working together. The green-skinned Orions originate in the very first (filmed) Star Trek episode ever, “The Cage,” though their culture was later fully explained in the Enterprise episode “Bound.” Orions have appeared in the Discovery era in the Season 1 finale, and also in the Short Treks episode “The Escape Artist.” The blue-skinned Andorians originate in the TOS episode “Journey To Babel.” Why is Burnham surprised the Andorians and the Orions are working together in some kind of official capacity? Well, the Andorians are founding members of the Federation. The Orions, meanwhile, were, at least in Burnham’s time, never part of the Federation.
Burnham is basically selling Star Trek collectables
Book tells the Andorian that “there’s a real market for this stuff,” when he’s trying to sell Burnham’s tricorder. This seems like a wink to the idea that vintage props from TOS or TNG are worth a lot of money IRL. Basically, what Burnham has is a vintage Star Trek prop.
Portable Transporter!
Burnham is wowed by the personal transporters. In the TNG episode “Captain’s Holiday,” time-traveling aliens from the 27th century called Vorgons, appeared to have similar types of transporters.
Burnham says Tilly can’t do space drugs
While trying to get her to talk, Burnham is hit with some form of future narcotic that makes her a slap-happy. She says that the drug makes her talkative and then says “I have a friend with red hair, you cannot give her any.” This references Tilly, of course, but more specifically, the idea that Tilly did some space drugs in the Discovery Season 1 finale, “Will You Take My Hand?”
Aliens rebooted from TNG and DS9
The mercenary who is pursuing Book appears to be a Yridian. In TNG, these aliens were mostly thought of as “information brokers,” notably in the episodes “The Chase” and “Birthright Part 1.” Meanwhile, at least one alien who is in pursuit of Burnham and Book is very clearly a Lurian. The famous patron of Quark’s Bar in DS9 – Morn – was a Lurian. He’s the guy with the long face.
Book references the biggest plot arc from Star Trek: Enterprise
After Book and Burnham have a frank conversation about time travel, Book says: “All time travel technology was destroyed after the temporal wars. Outlawed.” The Temporal Wars references the Temporal Cold War in Enterprise, and probably, the outright Temporal War that happened at the end of Enterprise Season 3 and the beginning of Season 4 in the episodes “Storm Front Parts 1 and 2.” One fashion from the Temporal War Cold War came from the 31st Century, about a hundred years or so before 3188.
Aditya Sahil references Spock
When Burnham meets Aditya Sahil, a Federation liaison in this time period, they have a serious chat about just how long it might take for the USS Discovery to actually show up. He says: “By the laws of temporal mechanics, they could arrive tomorrow…” And Burnham says: “Or in a thousand years.” This references a similar speech from Spock in the TOS episode “City on the Edge of Forever.” Like Burnham and the Discovery crew, Spock and Kirk are separated by time travel wonkiness. Spock says: “There is a theory. There could be some logic to the belief that time is fluid, like a river, with currents, eddies, backwash.” But later, Spock points out that “we can’t be too sure of our facts.” Even the earliest Star Trek time travel episodes dealt with people arriving at their temporal location at different times than people who were “right behind” them in the time portal.
Federation Flag
The episode ends with Burnham and Sahil raising the flag of the United Federation of Planets. We already saw this flag in the trailers, but it’s worth noting that it does appear to have fewer stars on it than the flag from the era of TNG and Picard. Sahil tells Burnham he has been watching this post for 40 years, which seems to imply that this Federation flag is at least 40 years old, if not older. So, the question is, how accurate is the flag? Did the Federation start losing members before the Burn? Or is this flag pre-Burn?
At this point, we don’t know. But because Season 3 of Discovery is all about rediscovering the Federation, this flag might be the visual representation of not just the themes of the season, but the literal plot too.
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Star Trek: Discovery Season 3 airs new episodes on Thursdays on CBS All Access.
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That Tender Light
Title: That Tender Light
Fandom: Star Trek: The Original Series
Relationships: Spock/Nyota Uhura (TOS)
Written for: LittleRaven in Star Trek Holidays 2019
Betaed by: phnelt
Word count: 11,497 words
Rating: teen
Summary: Spock and Nyota are colleagues and friends, nothing more. But now that Spock's bond with T'Pring has been broken, he can't help noticing Nyota in new ways.
On AO3. On Dreamwidth. On ff.net
Nyota was sitting at her desk playing games on her PADD while she waited for Christine. They'd been on opposite schedules for a couple of weeks and hadn't gotten a chance to talk. But now they were on the same shift again, so they could get together for tea and games, and given the rumors flying around the ship, Nyota wanted to check in to see that Christine was alright.
Half the rumors painted Spock as some sort of cave-man sexist pig throwing a temper tantrum. Half of them painted Christine as some sort of sex-crazed nymphomaniac. All of them had Christine as the subject of a brutal dressing-down.
None of it made any sense. Spock was unfailingly courteous and respectful in the best sense, and, like Captain Kirk, never failed to support the female officers and crew under his command when the situation called for it. Nor was he prone to viciousness of any kind. Sardonic was as bad as he got. Christine was a professional and would never sexually harass anyone, but especially not a patient.
And none of that even took into account what came after, with Spock countermanding the Admiralty's orders, the back-and-forth to Vulcan or not, Spock having a wife no one knew about (with poor Christine being right there when the surprise was sprung, which hadn't exactly quieted the rumors down any), and then the captain coming back to the ship unconscious. From Vulcan, of all places! One of the safest planets in the Federation! Nyota was confused and upset, and she didn't like either feeling.
The door chime rang. "Enter!" Nyota said.
It was Christine, impeccably groomed and styled as always, but still visibly worn.
"Christine!" Nyota said, tossing her PADD aside. She got up and hugged her friend. "How are you holding up?"
"Oh, please, Nyota, not you too," Christine said with a groan, sinking into one of the chairs. She buried her face in her hands. "Spock was ill and not himself, and anything else is bound up in patient confidentiality."
Nyota took the other chair across from her friend. Christine was so obviously disturbed by the whole thing that that couldn't be the whole story even without considering the rumors. "Must have been some illness," she observed carefully.
Christine snorted. "You don't even know the half of it, and that's all I'm going to say. But I can tell you that if Vulcan actually gave Starfleet Medical details on certain aspects of Vulcan biology, along with the cultural issues surrounding them, this whole mess would have been handled quite differently. And that's all I'm going to say. Frankly, this whole week has been hellish and I don't want to think about it one minute longer."
"All right," Nyota said quietly, taking her curiosity and locking it away for now. She wouldn't want to challenge Christine's professional ethics, and in any case, supporting her friend was more important than Nyota's questions getting answered. "What are you up for tonight? Game? Movie? Do you want distraction or just relaxation?"
Two days later, Spock asked her if she would like to resume their weekly jam sessions. He'd skipped the last two without notifying her; looking back, Nyota wondered if that missed session had been the first sign something was wrong.
She had to think about it; she'd always enjoyed playing with Spock, he was the only musician on the ship who could really keep up with her. And she considered him a friend (although, given Vulcan emotional reticence, she had no idea whether he considered her a friend). But that had been before he'd said … whatever he'd said to Christine. Before she'd been so forcefully reminded that he was alien, and that there was a lot about Vulcans that nobody knew because Vulcans just didn't talk about themselves.
Nyota got along just fine with people of many different races; you had to, as a communications officer. But she didn't like how he'd treated Christine, and she didn't like realizing she understood him less well than she'd believed she did. They'd never been close, but they'd been comfortable in each others' presence, and Nyota was decidedly uncomfortable now.
In the end, she went; whatever had happened between him and Christine, he'd been ill at the time and Christine didn't seem to be holding a grudge. If Christine wasn't, then it would be unreasonable of Nyota to do so when she didn't even know what had happened. And it was in one of the private gathering spaces on the rec deck, which was neutral territory if anything was.
Besides, the underlying problem was that Nyota had thought she'd understood Spock, and realized she was wrong, and a lack of understanding wasn't a problem that could be solved by avoidance.
"I apologize for missing our last two sessions without notifying you," Spock said as he tuned his lyre and she soaked the reed of her algaita.
"Apology accepted, Mister Spock," Nyota said. "I understand you weren't yourself." That she was not holding against him. The inconvenience was minor, and it was likely a symptom of his illness. It didn't make her any more comfortable about the rest of the situation, but she appreciated the courtesy.
"I was not," Spock said briefly. Was she imagining things, or was he uncomfortable? Sometimes Spock was surprisingly easy to read, for a Vulcan; sometimes he was perfectly opaque.
"Can I ask if you've apologized to Christine?"
That stopped him. His head shot up and he frowned slightly. "What should I be apologizing for?"
"What should you be apologizing for?" Nyota was incensed. "I don't know what happened because the rumor mill has gone crazy and she won't tell me because of confidentiality issues—although how you can claim confidentiality when it was in a public corridor with multiple crew members walking past is beyond me—but you tore a bloody strip off of her in public, and started a lot of very nasty rumors about both you and her, and you're the first officer and you've been mostly off duty since then so you may not have gotten any grief for it yet, but she has had no such protection."
He was very nearly green. "I did not—there are a number of substantial gaps in my memory of the last week. And there were occasional hallucinations and a number of very odd and lifelike dreams. I do not remember any such exchange, but that means little; and I cannot give you any idea of what my mental state was at that particular moment."
"Then why weren't you in sickbay?" Nyota demanded. "You were even still on the duty roster at that point, and if what you say is true you were certainly not competent to be giving orders for lunch, much less anything else."
"Unfortunately," Spock said, "when one's mind is imbalanced, rational judgment is often an early casualty. By the time the symptoms were undeniable, I was not capable of formulating a logical response to them." He hesitated. "May I ask what the rumors are?"
Nyota summarized them briefly for him, not going into the gory details but giving him the broad strokes of the main rumors.
"I see," he said, when she had finished. His shoulders were drooping, and he would not meet her eyes. His hands were clasped tightly in his lap. She had rarely seen him this discomposed. "Yes. I shall have to apologize. The altercation, whatever it was, was undoubtedly my fault, as was the public nature of it." He looked troubled, and slightly folded in on himself, and Nyota felt sorry for him. The whole thing must have been a nightmare—possibly literally.
"But you are better now?" Nyota said. "And Doctor McCoy knows what he needs to know should it happen again?" She was dying to know the whole story, but it wasn't her business as long as it didn't interfere with the running of the ship.
"Correct on both counts," Spock said, "although the chances of it recurring during the rest of Enterprise's five-year mission are miniscule."
"All right then," Nyota said, reassured that things would return to normal between them. She checked to see if her reed was ready. "Since the last time we met, I finished transcribing the next duet in the sequence into European musical notation, would you like to try it?"
"Certainly," Spock said, sitting up straighter so that he was a model of Vulcan stoicism. Nyota tucked her curiosity away and turned her attention to the music.
Spock took his time putting his lyre back in its case, so that Uhura left the practice room before him. He very carefully and deliberately did not watch her go, focusing instead on asserting his biophysical control so that he could stand and walk back to his quarters with no outward sign of his arousal.
He had always known that Uhura was a beautiful woman; that was obvious to anyone with eyes. But he'd never reacted so viscerally to her or any woman before, save T'Pring at the wedding-that-was-not.
Her hands as she'd trilled! The dance of her fingers over the instrument! So precise, so graceful! He had not been able to tear his eyes away, and felt ashamed at how he had gawked at her. She, of course, had not noticed; hands were not generally a major part of human visual erotic stimulation, and Vulcans certainly did not spread the details of their own sexuality around. Spock could not quite decide whether it was better that she had been unaware of his gaze (thus sparing him embarrassment) or if would have been better had she had known (thus being able to decide whether or not she wanted to be so gazed at).
Spock walked quickly to his quarters and took out the medical tricorder Doctor McCoy had given him for self-monitoring. His endocrine system was within normal tolerances, and none of the secondary symptoms of Pon Farr were showing. He was merely aroused.
He should have expected something like this. Vulcans matured differently than humans did, with two puberties, one in adolescence and the other at first Pon Farr. He was now fully adult, not subadult, and sexual responses were stronger in this stage of life. Moreover, he was no longer married; his bond with T'Pring had ever been tenuous, but it had curbed and absorbed some of what little sexual drive he had had as a subadult. Now, he needed a new mate, and every fiber of his body and brain knew it.
Nyota Uhura was beautiful, intelligent, competent, compassionate, and musical, and he respected her a great deal. Moreover, she was the woman he spent the most time with both in public and in private. It was only natural that he should find her alluring. If she were Vulcan, and not his subordinate, she would have been very nearly the perfect woman for him.
Alas, even if he wished to have a human mate (and after T'Pring, the idea had a certain appeal regardless of Nyo—of Uhura's—personal attractions), she was still his subordinate, and the regulations concerning such relationships were stringent, for very good reason.
This would require a great deal of meditation.
Nyota was cursing Nomad and going through all the drawers in her cabin, trying to learn as much about herself as she could, when the door chime sounded.
"Come," she said, walking from the bedchamber into the living room/office.
It was the ship's first officer, Commander Spock. The only time she could remember meeting him was when he administered the professional tests so that she could be re-certified as an officer. He had been somber, but without the hesitation or pity that marked virtually all of her interactions these days, and pronounced her 'Remarkably proficient as always, Lieutenant.'
She didn't know if he was a friend. But his presence had been easier to bear than all the friends who stopped in to hover awkwardly and tried to bond over reminiscences of things that were forever lost to her.
"Lieutenant Uhura," Spock said. "How are you settling in?" He was tall, the impression enhanced by his perfect posture. His face showed no emotion, but he didn't feel cold, merely still. He was very attractive, but somewhat intimidating. He entered her room with a catlike grace she couldn't help appreciating.
"Some moments better than others, Commander," she said. "Re-learning the academics is—well, not easy, but in some ways it was more of a refresher course than anything else. But anything personal—it feels like I'm a ghost in my own life. Some things I can piece together on my own from my records and the ship's log and conversations I've had since Nomad wiped my brain; other things, I really can't."
"I would be happy to help in any way I can," the Commander said. He had a nice voice, she noted, and wondered if he sang. "We regularly gathered to play music together, which you called our 'jam sessions.'"
"Ah!" Nyota said, brightening. "Then you can definitely help." She went to her bedroom and took out an instrument case. "What is this? It's obviously a double reed instrument of some sort, and it's not an oboe or one of the instruments in an Earth orchestra, and I haven't had time to dig through the computer's music database and figure out what it is."
"That is an algaita, an instrument from West Africa, especially prevalent among the Hausa and Kanuri peoples. You brought it because of all the African instruments you play, it was the smallest and thus easiest to fit in your mass allowance, thus serving double duty as a reminder of home and a musical instrument."
"But I'm not a Hausa, or Kanuri, am I?" Nyota said, frowning. "My file says I'm from Kenya in East Africa, part Kikuyu and part Luhya." And, judging from the items in her quarters, very proud of her heritage … which she no longer remembered anything about. Her insides twisted at another reminder of all that she had lost, and she carefully focused on keeping her breathing steady. She'd cried enough over her state, in the last few days; she was tired of feeling sorry for herself.
"That is true," said Spock, and she turned her attention back to him. "You never told me the story of how you came to learn that particular instrument."
"What other instruments do I play?" Nyota asked. Focusing on concrete things she could re-learn was much better than wallowing in grief.
"Your primary instrument is your voice," Spock said. "As for other instruments, you are competent on a wide variety of Terran stringed instruments, both African and other; most recently, I had been teaching you the Vulcan Lyre. You are apparently accomplished on the marimba, although I have never had the pleasure of hearing you play, for the Enterprise does not have one, nor any xylophones or other similar instrument."
"That's … a lot," Nyota said, dismayed. There was still so much to learn. Would she ever be back to what she had been?
"As with your hand-to-hand combat re-training and the operation of your station, muscle memory should make it easier to re-learn than it was to learn in the first place," Spock said.
"Yeah," Nyota said with a sigh. Well, start with the ones she had available on Enterprise, and the rest she could choose to re-learn—or not—at some later time when she had them available. She shook her head. "I'm sorry, where are my manners. Please, sit," she said, gesturing at one of the two chairs in the living room. "Would you like something to drink? I've got water and tea and some dehydrated drink mixes of various kinds."
"Tea would be appreciated," Spock said, taking the offered chair. He was easy on the eyes, and enjoyable to watch move, and she indulged in that for a second before getting out the tea caddy. She'd been through enough she deserved a bit of harmless pleasure.
Nyota let him choose what type of tea he wanted, and set the "hot" tap in the bathroom sink to the correct temperature for that type of tea. (Thankfully, it was labelled on the package, so she didn't have to look it up.)
"Well, Mister Spock, here you are," Nyota said when the tea was ready. She handed him one mug and sat down with her own, blowing on it to cool it. "I'm sorry, I don't know if there are any cultural things about hospitality I should be doing."
Spock tilted his head. "I cannot speak to your cultural practices, as I have never socialized with you in your quarters before. Were we on Vulcan, in a formal setting, the etiquette for serving refreshments is quite intricate. But we are not on Vulcan, we are not in a formal setting, and under the circumstances you have many other more important things to learn."
Nyota groaned. "I know. It's all so overwhelming and there is so much that I'll never get back. I want to take a break from thinking about it, and yet there's really nothing else I can think about." In a way, that first day or so had been the easy part. Everything had been so confusing, but she hadn't had any idea of just how much she needed to re-learn.
"As you know, I have been consulting with Doctor McCoy about your condition," Spock said.
"Yes," Nyota said, nodding. "Because Doctor McCoy knows the neurology, but if he were able to find a way of fixing my brain, he'd need some sort of specialized equipment and he's 'a doctor, dammit, not an engineer.'" She was quite proud of her mimicry of Doctor McCoy's irascible tone of voice.
"As you know, the chances are negligible that we shall find a technological solution at this point," Spock said. "However, from what scans have been able to determine, the majority of your memories are still there; Nomad did not erase the entire contents of your brain, merely severed the linkages necessary to access them."
"Yes, I know," Nyota said, a little irritated. "I have been paying attention to my own medical condition, Mister Spock."
"Of course," Spock said. "But while it is impossible at this time to build a device sensitive enough to physically rebuild those linkages, it has recently occurred to me that a sufficiently gifted and trained telepath might be able to do so."
"Really?" Nyota asked, feeling her heart begin to pound. "Where's the nearest telepath?"
Spock twitched, a little. "Vulcans are touch telepaths, however—"
"When can you do it?" she demanded. "Now?"
"No," Spock said. "I am not a trained healer. The nearest such is on Vulcan, a two week journey from here by shuttle."
"Shuttle?" Nyota sagged. "I'd have to leave Enterprise?" She had only a little over a week's worth of memories in her entire life, at least memories that she could access at the moment. The majority of that time, she'd been in sickbay. She had no memories of any place other than this ship. Something in her gut twisted at the thought.
"Possibly," Spock said. "I have not yet discussed this possible course of treatment with Doctor McCoy, and I would need to contact experts on Vulcan to make arrangements. But I wished for your consent before anything was done. Many humans would have qualms about allowing an alien telepath such intimate access to their mind; in order to work, the telepathic healer would have to have access to even the most personal of your thoughts and memories."
"Mister Spock, if it would get my memories back, I'd agree to have my memories broadcast across the quadrant!"
"Fortunately, that will not be necessary," Spock said, raising an eyebrow. "Very well. I will begin making arrangements."
Spock, Uhura, and Doctor McCoy had gathered in the Doctor's office to consult with a Vulcan healer over subspace. Spock was anxious to hear the verdict, for he very much hoped that the lieutenant's brain might be healed. It was more than the compassion he might feel for any sentient so injured, and more than the concern of a superior for one under his command. Uhura had handled her situation with a grace and courage and tenacity that Spock deeply admired. It spoke to the strength of her character, and his admiration for her had only increased.
He did not have long to dwell on this, however, as Healer T'Vyr was admirably prompt, and once the call had connected, wasted little time on pleasantries before sharing her conclusions. "While there is only a 29.4% chance of complete memory re-acquisition, your hypothesis is probably correct that a majority of the still-extant memories could be made accessible," Healer T'Vyr said over subspace.
"That's wonderful!" Uhura said. Indeed it was; Spock had to exert some control to keep his relief from showing.
"Indeed," T'Vyr said. "However, there remains a significant problem: no Vulcan mind-healer I have contacted has any experience with Human neural architecture. None have ever even mind-melded with a Human. Ideally, the healer would have melded with Lieutenant Uhura prior to the Nomad's attack, but failing that, they would need to have melded with multiple humans prior to the meld with the Lieutenant, so that they might know what a healthy human mind feels like."
"Where are we gonna find telepathic healers with that much experience, if there aren't any Vulcans?" Doctor McCoy asked. "Are there other species in the Federation with telepathic healers?"
"Possibly," Healer T'Vyr said. "However, there may be a simpler solution. This will require delicacy, but if Human brains are anything like Vulcan brains, the telepath will not be the one performing the re-association; the Lieutenant will be. Vulcan brains, and indeed those of most sapient species, make such connections easily so that memories may be formed in the first place."
"That's true of Human brains, too, ma'am," Doctor McCoy said. "Unless there's trauma of some sort involved."
Spock was filled with a sense of foreboding that was most illogical. He could predict the solution the healer was about to suggest, and it would be efficient and logical. While it would require him to reveal certain personal issues to the lieutenant, his privacy was not more important than her health.
"Spock, having studied your school records, I know that you melded with two humans over the course of your telepathic training, your mother and your foster-sister," Healer T'Vyr said. "Your instructors note that you have a delicate telepathic touch, and your instructor in telepathic ethics gave you a satisfactory report."
"I am not a healer," Spock noted.
"You may still be more qualified to help the Lieutenant than any Vulcan with healer training," T'Vyr said, "provided the Lieutenant is comfortable with accepting your help. In any case, as long as you do not try and force any connections, there should be no harm in trying. If you do not succeed, there would be nothing to stop the Lieutenant from travelling to Vulcan and being seen by a healer here. Or finding telepathic mind-healers elsewhere in the Federation."
"Well, that sounds like something we need to discuss on our end," Doctor McCoy said. "Thank you for your help. Lieutenant, you have any more questions?"
"I thought you didn't have any healers who had melded with humans on Vulcan," Uhura said. "Yet you still think I should come if Spock can't do it?"
"Lack of experience with Human brains is a solvable issue," T'Vyr said. "Although there are not many Humans on Vulcan, there are some, and the chances are very good that we would be able to find several who were willing to meld with your Healer to give them experience. It is not, however, ideal; mind-melds are, by their very nature, extremely intimate, and it is an enormous thing to ask of someone, to meld with a stranger, when they themselves have no medical or other need."
"I see," Uhura said.
There were no further questions, and so the communication was ended.
"Well, Spock, why didn't you say you could do it in the first place?" McCoy said.
"I am not a healer," Spock said. "If there were some sort of time pressure, and we could not wait to get Uhura to Vulcan or a healer here, then I would have volunteered."
"But—"
"If an away-team member had an injury requiring surgery," Spock said, "it would be appropriate for me to perform any emergency first-aid necessary, but not to perform the surgery myself, unless the landing party was cut off from the ship and the crew member would die without an immediate operation. The brain is a very delicate organ. Non-healers are taught to communicate through melds and regulate our own telepathy, not make adjustments in other peoples' minds."
"Point taken, Spock," McCoy said, crossing his arms. "But the Healer thinks you'd be capable, and I agree with her reasoning. What do you say, Nyota? Want to give Spock's magic fingers a try?"
Uhura frowned, looking him up and down. "Yes," she said, "but I think the Commander has reservations?"
Spock nodded. "As the situation is not time-critical, some discussion of the issues involved is necessary."
"Of course," McCoy said. "You can use my office, I'll be in the general sickbay."
As soon as the door closed behind him, Uhura turned to him with a frown. "Commander Spock, would you be okay with melding with me? If it's so intimate?"
"Under the circumstances, the intimacy would largely be on your side," Spock pointed out. "There would undoubtedly be some sharing on my part, as I do not have a healer's training in clinical shields. However, I would have to go through every memory of yours that I could find and present it to you so that your mind could make the appropriate connections. You would have no secrets from me, quite literally."
"That would be true of any telepath I saw, though, whether you or a healer on Vulcan," Uhura pointed out. She got up and began to pace. "The difference is, I know you, and I'm in comfortable surroundings here. My other option is travel to a place I've never been, trusting strangers with the secrets locked inside my skull that even I don't know about."
"The benefit to strangers doing this would be that you would never have to face anyone with that intimate knowledge of you again," Spock pointed out. "If I did it, and discovered things about you that you would rather I not know, you would have to see me every day, unless you transferred off of the Enterprise."
"Do you think I have any secrets that embarrassing?" Uhura asked, pausing.
"Unknown," Spock said. "You have always seemed to me to be a remarkably transparent individual, but you are also quite competent at undercover missions and any deception required professionally. And, obviously, you did not confide in me if you had any secrets you did not want me to know."
"Obviously," Uhura said with a snort, resuming her pacing. "You seem reluctant. It's your choice, Mister Spock, but I'd rather have you; I don't want to leave Enterprise and put myself in the hands of strangers. And then there's all the other people who'd have to have melds to give the healers experience, if I go that route, it's not any fairer to expect that of them than it is for me to expect it of you, if you would find it unpleasant."
"On the contrary, I suspect I would find it a pleasant experience," Spock said. "That is why I hesitate."
She stopped again and frowned at him. "I don't understand, Mister Spock, why would finding it nice be a problem?"
Spock gathered his courage. He would not have chosen telling her this way; might never have chosen to inform her of his feelings. Hours of meditation in the time since his … divorce … had been insufficient to settle within himself what his long-term personal goals should be, and until and unless he had decided to pursue a relationship with her it would be unprofessional to burden her with the knowledge of his affections. But there was no help for it. "I have recently discovered myself attracted to you, Ms. Uhura," he said. "Not merely to your body, but to your intelligence and quick-wittedness and personality, as well. I had not said anything yet because it was new, and I recently experienced a major life transition and wished to reach a state of personal equilibrium before making any large changes. In addition, given our respective ranks and positions in the ship's hierarchy, any relationship between us would require a great deal of care."
Uhura blinked several times, opening and closing her mouth before speaking. He studied her, and she returned the attention in kind. He could not trust himself to discern her reaction to his confession, but he hoped she was not offended. She did not seem to be.
"That's flattering, Mister Spock," she said at last, "but I don't know if I—"
"I am not asking for any reciprocity at this time, or even if such reciprocity might be possible in the future," Spock said. "If nothing else, your own mental state is such that you need time to recover and learn to stand on your own before making any serious relationship changes of your own. However, you needed to know before consenting to any mind-meld between us."
"Because I might find out during the meld?"
"Because if I wished to, I could almost certainly alter whatever feelings towards me you possess during the meld, and you would have no way of preventing it," Spock explained. "If nothing else, I could alter or create memories for you that would make you more disposed to accept my attentions, or simply prevent any memories critical of me from being remembered. I would never do any of those things because they would be an absolute violation of every ethical and moral standard, but I have the power to do them if I chose, and you have only my word and a week's acquaintance with me to base any decisions on."
"Oh," Uhura said, eyes wide. She swallowed. "But any telepath could do that, yes?"
"Yes," Spock said. "But a telepath who did not previously know you would have less motivation for such a crime, and tampering would be immediately obvious if, for example, you declared your undying love for someone you had only just met and wished to transfer to Space Central on Vulcan."
"Whereas you and I have served together for almost two years," Uhura said, thinking it through.
"And you have been known to flirt with me," Spock said. "As a sort of game, I believe, but an observer might not know that."
"And there's no one else here to double-check your work," Uhura said. Her body language was more closed off than it had been even thirty seconds earlier, and it grieved him to see, but it was better that she understand fully, and make an informed decision.
"Correct," Spock said. "I would never alter your thinking or your memories for my own benefit without your prior consent, but you have only my word for that. I can tell you that I would probably find exploring your mind to be a pleasurable experience, for I greatly admire you as a person and as an officer." He set aside his embarrassment to deal with later; right now, Uhura's future and mental health were the primary considerations.
Uhura made a face. "Would that be … an erotic sort of pleasure?" she asked hesitantly.
"Not in the physically arousing sense," Spock said, "although Vulcan notions of the erotic are different. I assure you, your memories would not become part of any fantasy life on my part."
"But, again, I would have only your word for that," Uhura said.
"Correct," Spock said. "I hope you understand why it is important that you understand fully the range of possibilities before consenting to any meld between us."
"Or between myself and any healer on Vulcan." Uhura closed her eyes and shook her head. "Can I talk with someone about this?"
Spock ignored his initial wish to deny her so that his private feelings might remain so. It was a logical question; since she had so little experience of his character to draw on, consulting with others who knew him better was the only way to get enough information to base a decision on. "If they understand that it is a private matter not to be gossiped about. Doctor McCoy would probably have a valuable perspective." Also, he understood the importance of patient confidentiality and would probably not tease Spock excessively about feelings he learned of in such circumstances.
"What about Christine?" Uhura asked. "She's been such a help since I lost my memory, and I know we were friends before Nomad's attack."
Spock swallowed. "Nurse Chapel would be acceptable," he said slowly, "and given her position as a nurse she has certainly seen me at my worst, in circumstances few others have. However, I believe she has an unrequited crush on me. She is a professional, and would not let it color any advice she gave you, but—"
"—but she might be hurt to know you were attracted to me and not her," Uhura said with a nod. "All right, I'll think about it and let you know."
Spock bowed in acknowledgment.
"You and Spock have a nice chat?" Doctor McCoy asked after Commander Spock had left.
"It was … revealing," Nyota said wryly. Flattering—she doubted he was the type to fall in love lightly, or based on superficial things, so to know he was attracted to her was a compliment both to who she was now and who she had been before the memory wipe. How she felt about him was a question she simply didn't have the energy to think about right now. Not while she had such a momentous decision to make.
"And? When are you going to do it?"
"You're so sure we're going to meld," Nyota said.
Doctor McCoy shrugged. "You heard Healer T'Vyr, he's the closest thing to an expert there is, and he'd make sure the job was done right. If you're not comfortable with him for some reason, you can go to Vulcan, of course, but I don't see why you'd spend that much time in a shuttle craft just to have a stranger poking at your brain."
"And I could trust him?"
"Yes," McCoy said without hesitation. "Absolutely. He drives me batty sometimes—and I do my best to return the favor—but his ethics are rock solid."
"Even when there's a lot of temptation?" Nyota asked. She was pretty sure she knew the answer.
"Yes," McCoy said. "That's when he tends to get the persnicketiest about things. Mind if I ask what exactly is bothering you? It'd help me to answer any specific questions you might have."
"He's attracted to me," Nyota said. "And … fairly deeply, if I was reading him right." His earnestness when he talked about all the things he saw in her, and the depth of his disquiet with confessing his feelings … no, this was no passing fancy.
"Spock's in love with you?" McCoy said with a splutter, standing up straighter.
"He didn't say he was in love with me," Nyota said. His surprise confirmed that Spock's affections weren't lightly or easily given. "He said he was attracted to me."
"Given how strictly he controls his emotions, it would have to be a pretty strong 'attraction' to be worth mentioning," McCoy said. "Why'd he tell you?"
"He wanted me to know because he wanted me to know what I was agreeing to, and tried to scare me off by pointing out that he could rearrange my mind to make me love him back." Nyota paused and thought for a few seconds. "Of course, if he were planning on doing something like that, he wouldn't have warned me ahead of time."
"That's Spock all over, though," McCoy said. "Making sure everything is done the right way, making sure you know exactly what you're getting into. Well, I can see why you'd want to ask about things, but I'd sooner believe he could fly without antigrav boots than that he'd take advantage of anyone telepathically like that. Still, if you'd rather go to Vulcan and have someone who's not in love with you rummaging around in your brain, I'll make the arrangements."
Nyota sighed. "I don't know. The idea of what he could do is frightening, but then, any telepath could do that. And this way I wouldn't have to leave Enterprise and have a stranger rummaging around in my mind."
She thought back to his confession that he would probably find pleasure in melding with her. She didn't begrudge him that; he was not the type to be creepy about it, and better that he liked it than imposing something he found distasteful. "I think I want Mister Spock to do it," she decided.
"You can have as much time to think about it as you want," Doctor McCoy said.
"More time won't change the options," Nyota pointed out. "I don't have enough experience to make judgments on how trustworthy any telepath is. You say he's trustworthy; well, I believe you. And I like him, what I've seen of him. And I am tired of wondering who I was before and what I'm missing now."
"Fair enough," McCoy said.
The meld was a success. When it was over, Spock left Uhura in McCoy's capable hands and retreated back to his cabin to meditate. He was in great need of it.
A deeper knowledge of Uhura's mind had only proven how fascinating a woman she was. His baser instincts were tempting him to dwell on what it might be like to have her in his mind always, but he had given her his word that he would not use what he had learned about her in the meld to fantasize about, and he intended to keep that word.
Still, he now knew first-hand that any bond with her would be completely different from that which he had shared with T'Pring, and only partially because she was human and T'Pring was Vulcan. T'Pring had isolated herself from him, responding in the most superficial way possible, and that only when ignoring him was not possible. Spock had responded in kind. But Uhura had welcomed him, in the meld, and he did not think merely because she desired his help. He doubted she would shut him out.
Of course, he acknowledged, the same might be said for any Vulcan woman who agreed to marry him. T'Pring had never desired to be his bondmate; it had been chosen for them, and her parents should have seen her reaction and found someone else for her. If he married now, it would be to a woman who had chosen him, and if T'Pau offered a potential match with a woman who was not compatible with him, it would be simple to decline. It was illogical to believe that because Uhura was the first eligible woman he had melded with who did not find his mental touch a burden, that she was the only such woman in existence.
It had been only a short time since T'Pring rejected him. Long-established research in both Vulcan and Human psychology clearly showed that making major decisions or changes too soon after a major loss such as a divorce or bereavement was likely to result in suboptimal results. Thus, as he had concluded from the beginning, it would be illogical to seriously consider a new relationship, either with Uhura or through the offices of T'Pau as matchmaker, until the debacle of his marriage was far enough in the past that he could view it with at least a degree of equanimity.
He turned his meditations to the now-familiar task of acknowledging and taming his feelings for Uhura.
Two days after the meld, Nyota laid on her bed in her quarters, staring up at the ceiling and trying to concentrate on the music she was listening to. It was completely different from any style of music in her personal playlists, and as far as she could tell she'd never heard anything like it before in her life. It was just what she needed: something unlikely to trigger any of the memories that she could now access, thanks to Spock.
Ironic, after spending a week digging for memories so frantically.
A lifetime of memories was a lot to go through, and the meld had been very intense. She felt like her brain was a dresser that had had its entire contents scattered about the room, examined, and then put back in place, and she wasn't quite sure there was room for everything. Her brain felt very … full.
The door chimed. "Come in," she said, sitting up.
It was Christine. "How are you feeling?" she asked as she walked through the sitting area to the bed chamber. "And what are you listening to?"
"Sixty-year-old popular music from a non-aligned world called S'hrevlar," Nyota said. "It's very distracting."
"I can tell," Christine said wryly.
Nyota turned it off. "And are you asking as my nurse or my friend?"
"Both," Christine said. "The meld took a lot out of you and Spock both, but he's back on duty and you're not."
Nyota sighed. The meld had taken hours, and been very draining. And then had come all the work of putting the memories she could now access into some sort of coherent order and narrative. In the two nights since, her dreams had been eventful, and Doctor McCoy thought that REM sleep was probably the best thing for her, so she was trying to take naps in addition to her normal sleep cycle. But even while she was awake, she was constantly seeing things with new eyes and putting together the puzzle pieces of her mind. "It's getting better," she said. "It's definitely much better today than it was yesterday, and better this afternoon than it was this morning when I had my checkup. It's just … it's just a lot, and I'm so tired. Not sleepy, just worn."
Christine hummed. "I can't even imagine."
"Hopefully, you won't ever have to," Nyota said, and changed the subject. She'd spent enough time dwelling on her own problems, recently, and not enough time just hanging out with her friend.
She and Christine had a nice chat, and after her friend left, Nyota flopped back on the bed. Now that she had (most of) her memories back, she was glad she hadn't told Christine about Spock's affections for her, when she'd asked Christine's opinion on Spock's ethics. That would have been awkward, and unnecessarily hurtful to Christine. (Reliving her memories of that mystery-shrouded trip to Vulcan had been one of the few times that Spock's own emotions had come through in the meld—he hadn't been able to hide how embarrassed he still was over the whole thing, how he'd treated Christine but also something deeper he hadn't shared with her. It felt like ages ago, but hadn't been all that long before the encounter with Nomad which had wiped her memories.)
Wait a minute. Nyota narrowed her eyes as something occurred to her. Spock was married! To that Vulcan woman who'd called them when they arrived at Vulcan! What was he doing falling in love with her if he was married? She'd thought Vulcans had better control over their feelings than that.
She rose, checked her appearance in the mirror to make sure she was presentable, and went to go ask him about it.
Spock was in his quarters and responded promptly when she pressed the door chime.
"Ms. Uhura," he said, inviting her to take a seat. "Would you care for some tea?"
"Thank you," she said, slightly taken aback. He'd never offered her tea before, but then, she'd never visited him in his quarters before.
"This is theris-na'na, which is more palatable to humans than most other Vulcan varieties of tea," Spock said, presenting her with a cup after a few minutes work.
"Thank you," she said, taking a sip. "It's good!" She didn't know how to describe it; it wasn't like any Earth tea she knew. But it didn't require sugar or milk or lemon or anything to make it drinkable.
"Kh'halwer nash-vey k'odu," Spock said. When Nyota hesitated, he went on. "The traditional response is th'i-oxolara kh'harwa."
She repeated it carefully. "I don't know that I've ever heard you speak Vulcan before."
"You still have not, as there is no single 'Vulcan' language."
Nyota felt her cheeks heat. She knew Vulcan, like most planets, had a plethora of languages; she so seldom fell prey to the common practice of labelling the most common language of a planet as the planet's only language. "Any language of Vulcan," she corrected herself. "What language were you speaking?"
"Shi'Kha'ri," Spock said.
Nyota raised an eyebrow at him. "You mean, the language that is most commonly called 'Vulcan' by offworlders?"
"Precision is important," he said severely, although she could tell he was amused.
"Are there any other cultural expectations?" Nyota asked.
Spock took a sip of his own tea. "Vulcans—at least, those following Shi'Kha'ri manners—do not typically speak when food or drink is being consumed. However, outsiders often find the silence to be … oppressive, and I have never minded one way or the other."
"Ah," Nyota said. She'd lost the momentum she'd had when she came here, but she still wanted to know the answer. "Spock, when you told me you had feelings for me, you implied you were considering asking to start a romantic relationship with me."
"Yes. Although I am not ready for any such step, just yet, and may not be any time in the immediate future."
"But you're married!" Nyota burst out. "Your wife called the bridge, what was her name—"
"T'Pring," Spock said, somewhat harshly. "She divorced me."
"Oh." Nyota was taken aback. "I'm sorry." She thought about the timing. "Wait, she divorced you when you were sick? So sick you could only be treated on your homeworld?"
"Yes." Spock sighed. "To be fair to her, Vulcan divorces require both spouses to be present with a priest or healer, so that the telepathic bond may be severed. I had not been back to Vulcan in many years."
"And if she'd asked for a divorce, would you have taken leave and gone to visit?" Nyota asked.
"Yes," Spock said, "although it is considerably more complicated, and difficult, than obtaining a divorce on Earth."
"Still!" Nyota said. She paused. "I'm sorry for bringing it up, it must still be a sore spot."
"Yes," Spock said dryly. He looked aside. "Vulcans prize marriage very deeply, and while my relationship with T'Pring was never close, it was still—I have not been alone in my own skull since we were betrothed at age seven. It is … more difficult than I would have thought, to adjust. A part of me would like to remarry immediately, merely so that I would not have to learn how to be … solitary."
Was he trying to hint that he wanted a serious relationship with her? No, Spock wasn't the type to beat around the bush. But it did put his feelings in a different light. "I'm not opposed to marriage, eventually, but there are a few necessary steps first," Nyota said. Such as deciding if she felt more for him than just 'very attractive man she liked a great deal.'
Spock blinked and looked at her. "I did not mean to imply that I wish to marry you in the immediate future. My apologies for the imprecision. No, if I wished to marry quickly, I would ask my clan matriarch T'Pau and she would find an appropriate Vulcan woman for me to marry. Indeed, I have no doubt that she will soon begin presenting me with possible options whether I ask her to or not."
"So Vulcans go in for arranged marriages," Nyota said, wondering if the T'Pau he named was the T'Pau—if so, no wonder the admiralty hadn't punished the captain for the diversion to Vulcan. "I'm sure based on all sorts of logical criteria."
"Yes," Spock said. "Telepathic and mental compatibility being one of those criteria—which is one reason I should not have been so surprised when T'Pring … did what she did. She and I were never close, even when we were first betrothed."
"And you were seven?" Nyota asked. That seemed terribly young. On a more personal note, the meld would have undoubtedly given him an idea of whether they were telepathically and mentally compatible. Now she was curious what she would have learned about him, if the meld had been more reciprocal.
"Yes," Spock said. "Seven is the customary age, in my clan."
"Why so young?"
"Vulcans are more psychologically stable when we have telepathic bonds, and that is around the age when our bonds with our parents begin to fade," Spock said. "And it is traditional. Not all clans bond their children, or do so that young, and not every House within every clan does it; but most do."
"And now you have no bond," Nyota said, softly, trying to imagine it. "What does that feel like to you? Do you miss it?"
"Like a missing limb," Spock said. "Understand, I do not wish T'Pring back; but I do wish to be bonded. However, the most expedient way to achieve that would be to marry whatever woman T'Pau suggests, and I do not know that marrying a stranger simply to be bonded would be an optimal long-term solution."
"Well, it's sure not the solution I would choose," Nyota said, shaking her head. "I suppose you don't know any unmarried Vulcan women?"
"No. I have spent most of my adult life in Starfleet, in majority-human environments, and approximately 90% of all adult Vulcans are married."
"Ninety percent?" Nyota said. "Wow!" She considered all that Spock had told her. "So when you said you were going through a major life change and needed to figure out what you wanted out of life before even considering whether to act on your feelings for me, you weren't exaggerating, were you."
"I do not exaggerate," Spock said. "In addition, there is another critical consideration: your feelings and wishes, which you have never discussed with me. And the fact that you are currently recovering from a significant trauma. Your resilience is most impressive, and I wish to support you in whatever way you require. Requesting major life changes on your part at this time would be … both selfish and thoughtless."
"Thank you, Spock," Nyota said, touched. "I do want to … settle back in to my life, so to speak, and I hope things will go back to normal as quickly as possible. Well," she said, correcting herself, "as normal as things ever get on Enterprise. I hope I didn't just jinx us."
"Luck—and jinxes—are illogical, Lieutenant," Spock said. "Statistical analyses will always reveal that, when the observer's biases are corrected for, improbable things do not correlate in statistically significant ways to any individual, object, or vessel."
"Spock, two things," Nyota said. She was happy they'd had the conversation, happy to have learned more about him, but still, she was relieved to have the conversation turn lighter. "First, when we're off-duty, you can call me Nyota." After rummaging through her brain, he knew her more intimately than any other person ever had, and it seemed silly to stand on formality. She'd never offered her first name before, but then she'd always felt constrained by the gap in their ranks, but then again, he'd never been this candid with her, either. "Second, how else do you explain all the things that happen to this ship without luck, good and bad alike?"
"Even million-to-one chances occur with some regularity given a large enough sample size," Spock said. "And calculating the odds of any given happenstance is difficult when one is studying the unknown."
"True," Nyota said, "but Enterprise isn't the only Federation starship exploring the unknown, and I've spend enough time gossiping with my fellow communications officers to know that odd and improbable things happen to us at a much higher rate than they do to our sister ships. Do you have any statistical explanation for that that doesn't boil down to 'we're just lucky that way'?"
Spock opened his mouth, but hesitated before speaking.
"I thought not," Nyota said triumphantly. "I'm back on duty starting tomorrow. I'll see you on the bridge in the morning, Spock." She slipped out the door with a smile on her face. It wasn't often she got the last word in a debate with him without cheating in some way.
It wasn't until she was back in her quarters that she realized he very carefully hadn't asked what her feelings toward him might be. Which was considerate of him, given how unsettled she was right now, but still left the question: how did she feel about him? He was very attractive and compelling, of course; she'd always been quite aware of that. And she enjoyed the challenge of sparring verbally with him (and flirting with him when she could get away with it). And he was a friend. But she had always considered him unattainable, and so never put much serious thought into the question.
He was very intense, and that was a quality she appreciated in a partner. The thought of all that intensity focused on her … she shivered, tingling a little. There was a reason she'd never let herself seriously consider his attractiveness. He'd been unapproachable, untouchable, and why open herself to that heartbreak? She'd had her fill of hopeless crushes as a teenager, thank you.
Except now he wasn't unapproachable.
Of course, part of that intensity meant that he wanted a serious relationship that might lead to marriage, and while Nyota had always thought she'd probably get married some day, it had always been something to set aside until some nebulous future after she was done with her adventuring. But a fellow officer on the same ship, that was a relationship she could have while adventuring. And once the Enterprise's five year mission was over, they could always ask to be posted together, if their relationship were still going strong then.
It was an appealing picture.
But what if they tried a relationship and it didn't work? He was much farther along in his attraction to her than she was to him. That might change, but it might not, and she didn't want to hurt him.
She laughed out loud at the absurdity of that thought. "Nobody knows how a relationship's going to end when they start it," she told herself. "And you never know, he might realize a relationship with a human is nicer in fantasy than reality and dump me."
Well. She wasn't ready for anything right this minute, but … it might be an interesting thing to try in the future.
Spock spent the rest of the evening working out a statistical analysis of the Enterprise's mission thus far, as compared to other starships on similar missions throughout Federation and pre-Federation history, and concluded that while the Enterprise was indeed (thus far) more likely to experience unusual events than other starships, it was not the only ship to experience such a pattern, and past performance was no indicator of future events, and so it was just as possible that Enterprise would soon experience no more than the normal unforseen events that happened to any exploratory vessel, while some other ship would find itself experiencing a string of unusual events.
The analysis was not as convincing as he had hoped it might be, but he sent it to Nyota's inbox anyway.
The next morning on the bridge, she got it, sent him a wry look, and set to annotating it in between her attention to her work responsibilities. By the end of the shift she had sent it back to him with insightful comments at every weak point in his analysis, and a note. "Still sounds like luck to me.—N"
Instead of allowing Nyota time to ease back into her life and work and Spock time to contemplate his wishes and priorities, the next mission was exactly the sort which happened to Enterprise more than other Starfleet vessels. The mission to Halka brought a dramatic twist and proof of alternate universes all at the same time. The scientific results were fascinating; the alternates of their crewmates were appalling.
It only took a brief interview with the alternates for a deep fear to plant itself in his gut: did his counterpart harbor similar feelings for the other Nyota, and, if so, what would such a man do to the object of his affections? It was illogical to dwell on the possibilities. Spock was certainly not responsible for the conduct of his alternate, and there was nothing he could do to protect Nyota except finding a way to retrieve the stranded away team, which he and the entire science and engineering teams were working on as quickly as they could. Meditation sufficed to keep his fear leashed, but could not relieve it.
It took a great deal of effort to maintain his control when the away team returned safe and sound, and Nyota showing no signs of trauma beyond that of a stressful undercover mission.
"Still don't believe in luck, Spock?" Nyota asked, after the debriefings were over and she'd had time to rest and write her report. "What other ship would have run into such a thing?" She proved quite immune to his logic and statistics, but the debate was entertaining anyway.
After that were a string of missions that, while noteworthy in themselves, were hardly out of the normal range of their experiences, and then came a mission Spock had been dreading since it was put on their schedule: a trip back into the Federation to pick up ambassadors and escort them to a neutral location for a summit. While he was grateful for the opportunity to see his mother, he could quite easily have gone another eighteen years without speaking to his father. But that was not an option as first officer of a ship his father was travelling on.
Nyota got to their usual practice room before Spock, and was warming up on her algaita by playing a song that had been popular when she'd been a teenager. She was surprised when he walked in with a middle-aged Human woman wearing Vulcan robes. "Hello," Nyota said. "I'm Lieutenant Uhura. Spock, do you need to reschedule?" Maybe the woman was a diplomat and needed something.
"Oh, please don't on my account, I've been looking forward to hearing him play," the woman said with a fond look at Spock, patting him gently on the arm. Spock looked mildly embarrassed.
His mother, perhaps? Spock's mother was Human, though Nyota hadn't known his mother was a diplomat. And why had he brought her here? They weren't even dating yet, much less at the meet-the-parents stage. And wasn't that telling, she realized, that apparently her subconscious thought of dating Spock as a matter of 'when' and not 'if.'
"Lieutenant Uhura, this is my mother," Spock said, confirming her guess. "Doctor Amanda Grayson."
Nyota blinked. "The Doctor Grayson, who worked on the Universal Translator team? The first Human to teach at the Vulcan Science Academy?"
"I see my reputation precedes me," Doctor Grayson said with a smile.
"I don't want to take time away from you and Spock, because I'm sure it's been a while since you've seen one another, but I would love to talk with you about your work," Nyota gushed. "As head of Communications, so much of what I do uses your translator as a base."
"Not just my translator, I was one of a large team," Doctor Grayson said with a smile. "But I bet Spock would find the conversation interesting as well."
"Languages are a hobby for me, not a vocation," Spock said, "but I do have some interest in the field, and even more in the computer programming which undergirds the Universal Translator's work. I would be quite interested in such a conversation as well."
"Wonderful!" Doctor Grayson said, clapping her hands. "I'll listen to you practice—please don't mind me, or think you have to perform for me; I'm just interested to hear what my son is up to these days—and then we can go get some lunch and talk linguistics, as I know Spock won't mind talking during his meal."
That lunch with Nyota and his mother was the pleasantest two hours Spock had spent in a long time. Of course his mother got along well with Nyota; they both were good people with excellent taste and similar interests. (He steadfastly did not contemplate how his father would react to learning his son wished to marry a human instead of a Vulcan woman of sufficient standing to make up for the alliance lost with T'Pring's challenge; in this, as in most things familial, Spock had no doubt that his father would be deeply hypocritical.)
After the surgery which saved his father's life, Nyota came to visit Spock in his quarters while he recovered. He'd been lying in bed in his meditation robe when she chimed for admittance. The doctor had been forced to take a significant amount of blood, and Spock was on strict orders to rest and eat well for a day or two while his body replenished the supply.
"Come in," he said at the door's chime, rolling out of bed and wincing at the lingering light-headedness.
Nyota stepped in. She was beautiful as ever, and it was pleasant to see her in something other than a uniform. The colorful caftan suited her, as everything did. "I'm not much of a chess player," she said, "and I know that's your game, and I don't know any Vulcan games, but if you'd like to play a game I could learn. I know when I'm sick or injured, the boredom is almost the worst part and I can't imagine it's any better for you."
"An untaxing entertainment to pass the time would be appreciated," Spock said. "If there is a game you are fond of, I am sure I could learn well enough for our purposes."
"You're the one who's under the weather, so we'll play one of your games," Nyota said. "When I'm injured, you can return the favor."
"Very well," Spock said, and got out his kal toh set, putting it in the simplest mode. As both a musician and a linguist, Nyota's skill at pattern-recognition was significantly above average for a Human, and she might find the game interesting.
"I noticed your parents touched a great deal, just their fingertips," Nyota said, making conversation in the middle of their second game. "It surprised me, because Vulcans generally avoid touching other people."
"Being touch telepaths, touching others with bare skin can easily result in unwanted reading of surface thoughts," Spock said. "Given that the majority of nerves which carry telepathic information in Vulcans are in the hands, touching hands is far more intimate than any other part of the body. But Vulcan marriage includes not just physical and emotional intimacy, but mental and telepathic intimacy as well."
"And that touch was … intimate?" Nyota asked.
Spock sighed. "As a child, I was often embarrassed by how visibly and frequently they touched in that manner."
Nyota laughed. "I was embarrassed by my parents kissing. But that didn't stop them—my dad would make their kisses noisier and more theatrical to tease me."
"My mother had that impulse as well, although my father would rarely indulge her outside our home," Spock said.
Nyota hummed and reached out to touch a piece.
"I would not advise that," Spock said.
"Why? No, no, don't tell me, I'll figure it out." Nyota frowned and studied the set for a few minutes, before her expression cleared and she made a much better move.
Nyota sat in the rec deck chatting and laughing with Christine and a few other friends. Spock was sitting on the other side with the Captain, and she couldn't help sneaking looks at him. She had a very good view of him from here, long and lean and graceful, relaxed and content.
He really was very attractive. And she knew him much better now than she had a few months ago. They played kal-to regularly now, in addition to their jam sessions. Even their music had changed. Where once they had focused exclusively on the music, now it was a jumping off point for discussions about music theory, other musical experiences they'd had, and anything else that came up. They'd been growing closer, and she enjoyed spending time with him.
That internal slip she'd made when he introduced his mother really had been telling, she realized. It was a 'when' and not an 'if,' at least from her point of view. And she was ready to be done with waiting.
"What do you think, Nyota?" Christine asked, and Nyota turned her attention back to her friends.
She did make a point of rubbing her fingers together where Spock could see. And from the looks he was sending her way, he'd noticed. She smiled.
Nyota left the rec room, headed for her quarters. "Lieutenant, may I speak with you?" Spock was always more formal in the corridors and other public spaces.
"Why, of course, Commander," she said, voice honeyed. She waited for him to catch up at the turbolift.
"May I ask the purpose of that display?" he asked, once they were inside. He was tense, every line of his body taut.
"I'm back to normal, and I'd be interested in trying a relationship if you are, Spock," Nyota said. "And I thought I'd give you incentive to make up your mind, one way or the other."
"I—you are sure?" he asked, hesitant in a way she'd never seen him be.
"Yes, Spock, I am," Nyota said. "I wouldn't tease about that." She shrugged. "Now, I know you have a lot of decisions to make, and this is probably a bigger deal for you than for me, as Vulcans don't date casually the way Humans do. I don't know if you want to actually try something, but I'm ready if you are."
"I am very unlikely to be content with casual anything," Spock said.
"I kind of figured," Nyota said. "I can't say I'd be willing to marry you right now, if you asked me, but I can't say I'd mind that as a direction to explore. And if we're going to start exploring in that direction, I'm as ready now as I'll ever be. You might need more time, and I respect that. But if all you need is a sign from me, well.…" She held up two fingers, as she'd seen his parents do. His eyes widened and from this close she could see his pupils dilate.
Slowly he stretched out a hand to match, and his eyes closed.
Oh.
That—she hadn't expected to get anything out of the finger caress. But she could feel him, not as clearly as in the meld, no direct thoughts, but she could feel the pulse of them, and the arousal that had been thrumming through him since she started flirting in the rec room. Then he began stroking his fingers against hers, and that was even better.
She really wanted to kiss him, and she leaned in to do just that. He met her halfway; well, of course, he could feel what she wanted. And the kiss was even better, because he didn't let go of her hand and she could still feel him, and he her.
Most first kisses were just a little awkward as you got to know your partner's body, but not this one. Spock could tell exactly what she wanted, and the result was a kiss that made her toes curl and her knees go slightly weak.
The turbolift beeped as they arrived at their destination, and they disengaged. Fortunately, there weren't any people waiting for the turbolift, because if she looked as dazed as Spock did, and people saw them, the rumors would spread at lightspeed.
"Well, Mister Spock," Nyota said, "I call that a promising experiment. But I think it needs further testing, don't you?"
"Indeed," Spock intoned, following her down the corridor.
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